[24m] New girl I am seeing is much far more attractive than anyone I have seen before. I somehow got less turned on and I am feeling nervous about sex! I am looking for advice or any sort of explanation about these feelings? /u/give_me_hare Sex

Background:

I have been seeing her for a few weeks now. We live in a small-ish town and have quite different schedules so our first few dates were all in town. Last week she came to mine for the first time (during the day) – we only had a few hours as I was leaving on a work trip (where I am now). We got to first base or so and had a great time. I am normally quite confident with sex even when I am really into the other person but with her I am now really nervous about the sexual side of things.

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The ‘problem’

In my dating life, I had accepted I am never going to be dating a supermodel / the sort of girls you see on Instagram but that I can still date people I personally find attractive (for their personalities as much as their bodies) I am used to dating ‘normal’ people in my league and have actually become quite confident when it comes to sex and dating – so much so that I now find ‘normal’ people more attractive due to good experiences (I am very grateful for this). This new girl is someone I NEVER thought I would have any chance with! Not saying she isn’t normal but she is extremely extremely attractive. The sort of person I would look at and think ‘oh if only I was a 10/10 man maybe I would have a chance’ Weirdly – I am less worried about her not being into me than me not being able to relax and get turned on by her – maybe because of previous conditioning to be more into less attractive people?

My thoughts:

I think I got so used to blocking out fantasies of being with someone like her. So much so that I actually somehow got less turned on by her and so feel quite nervous about sex and performing.

I know this is a strange problem to have and I hope it makes sense.

I am hoping that people here can maybe share similar experiences or give me advice on the situation. Is this sort of feeling common?

TLDR:

I am seeing someone extremely attractive but weirdly find it harder to be turned on by her as I’m used to dating more normal people. This is making me really nervous about sex in a way I haven’t felt before.

Background:

I have been seeing her for a few weeks now. We live in a small-ish town and have quite different schedules so our first few dates were all in town. Last week she came to mine for the first time (during the day) – we only had a few hours as I was leaving on a work trip (where I am now). We got to first base or so and had a great time. I am normally quite confident with sex even when I am really into the other person but with her I am now really nervous about the sexual side of things.

————————————————————————————

The ‘problem’

In my dating life, I had accepted I am never going to be dating a supermodel / the sort of girls you see on Instagram but that I can still date people I personally find attractive (for their personalities as much as their bodies) I am used to dating ‘normal’ people in my league and have actually become quite confident when it comes to sex and dating – so much so that I now find ‘normal’ people more attractive due to good experiences (I am very grateful for this). This new girl is someone I NEVER thought I would have any chance with! Not saying she isn’t normal but she is extremely extremely attractive. The sort of person I would look at and think ‘oh if only I was a 10/10 man maybe I would have a chance’ Weirdly – I am less worried about her not being into me than me not being able to relax and get turned on by her – maybe because of previous conditioning to be more into less attractive people?

My thoughts:

I think I got so used to blocking out fantasies of being with someone like her. So much so that I actually somehow got less turned on by her and so feel quite nervous about sex and performing.

I know this is a strange problem to have and I hope it makes sense.

I am hoping that people here can maybe share similar experiences or give me advice on the situation. Is this sort of feeling common?

TLDR:

I am seeing someone extremely attractive but weirdly find it harder to be turned on by her as I’m used to dating more normal people. This is making me really nervous about sex in a way I haven’t felt before.