Literally how to tell her our lack of sex is becoming a huge problem for me? /u/Flaccidspasm Sex

I’m autistic and feel like everything I say is wrong or over explained or comes off as rude/sarcastic. I know that I know her better than reddit strangers, but I’m hoping for some guidance. I’m a little drunk rn and neurotic af 24-7. Anyway. I feel completely lost.

Going on 13 years together. I used to be able to just give her a look and she would giggle and we’d be all over each other in seconds. We used to have sex 4, 5 times a week. Of course things and people change and grow and our lives are busy and we have kids from previous relationships but that look…overstayed it’s welcome? Maybe it’s me, but the look doesn’t work anymore.

I’m still so incredibly attracted to her. She’s easily the best sex I’ve ever had. And I hate that we don’t have sex anymore. I miss her so much. I love hanging out and doing nothing, but I wanna fuck! I’m in a (other than twice a month, tops) sexless monogamous relationship. I try to initiate and almost always get “I’m not in the mood” or “I don’t wanna shower rn and I’m gross”. And yes I feel I do so much to make her feel special and beautiful and loved unrelated to sex. Do people just stop liking to fuck as they get older? We’re only 38. I don’t know what else to say to her. I don’t do ultimatums as I see them as manipulative. But I’m close to “we need to fuck more or I’m done”. Is that evil? Those aren’t the right words at all. Can someone help me?

I’m autistic and feel like everything I say is wrong or over explained or comes off as rude/sarcastic. I know that I know her better than reddit strangers, but I’m hoping for some guidance. I’m a little drunk rn and neurotic af 24-7. Anyway. I feel completely lost.

Going on 13 years together. I used to be able to just give her a look and she would giggle and we’d be all over each other in seconds. We used to have sex 4, 5 times a week. Of course things and people change and grow and our lives are busy and we have kids from previous relationships but that look…overstayed it’s welcome? Maybe it’s me, but the look doesn’t work anymore.

I’m still so incredibly attracted to her. She’s easily the best sex I’ve ever had. And I hate that we don’t have sex anymore. I miss her so much. I love hanging out and doing nothing, but I wanna fuck! I’m in a (other than twice a month, tops) sexless monogamous relationship. I try to initiate and almost always get “I’m not in the mood” or “I don’t wanna shower rn and I’m gross”. And yes I feel I do so much to make her feel special and beautiful and loved unrelated to sex. Do people just stop liking to fuck as they get older? We’re only 38. I don’t know what else to say to her. I don’t do ultimatums as I see them as manipulative. But I’m close to “we need to fuck more or I’m done”. Is that evil? Those aren’t the right words at all. Can someone help me?