Flaming Kobold inadvertently creates a new religion with a half cooked troglodyte /u/redditisweird801 DnD: Roll for Initiative!

So, I’m the DM and the party is raiding a mafia base filled with reptile humanoids, with the leading bos being Two-Toes Johnny, an Italian tortle.

The party has different curses, like Legends of Avantris. So they could be good, bad, or in between. Our happy little Kobold with a height insecurity got the curse of flames. So he is covered in fire and doesn’t take damage. The plan is to burn down the building, but naturally stealth fails, so he casts fly and bursts through the second story window.

What do ya know, he found the “night shift” (Troglodytes). As flames lick around the once pitch black room he sees eyes peering from the dark at him. So naturally, he’s scared, so with his gut reaction, he casts fireball in the small room.

But listen dear readers, imagine this from the troglodytes view. Your sleeping, when you wake up to glass shattering and light and flame peering into the room. Who is it? A flying kobold that is ablaze, not even injured. Is it god? Who knows, because he casts FIREBALL.

Two of them survive the blast, one almost dead leaning against the wall and the other charges at him through the flames, and bites him. The kobold then casts guiding bolt and puts him to the brink of death.

Now this is when the other party members say this, “He’s cooking alive, he looks kinda like a frog, TRY HIM.” Naturally he does, WHILE THE TROGLODYTES STILL ALIVE. He proceeds to spit it out landing on its face. In horror, it swallows its own flesh and dies.

The other troglodyte is terrified and looks on in horror. Then, the kobold decides to take ANOTHER piece of meat, and shoot it with another guiding bolt, trick shoting the meat of its brother on to its face. The troglodyte cries as it slides off his faces and screams, “WHY MUST YOU DO THE GOD!?!?”

Realizing his sudden change in status, the kobold decides he needs a follower, so he casts fly on it. But it’s a touch component, so he casts cure wounds then proceeds to burn a smiley face into it’s forehead to activate fly and as a branding.

Lizardfolk soldiers come rushing down the hallway and open the fire filled room after hearing the commotion. When the smoke clears and they can see, they watch in awe and confusion, as the troglodyte they’ve only seen once or twice, is floating out the window behind a kobold surrounded in flame.

In the end the building collapsed, and that’s where the session ended. And that was only part of the lunacy that happened in that session, so let me know if you want more. I can also speak of other horrors that the kobold has caused. That poor, poor fairy family…

TLDR; The stealth plan is no more, so naturally the kobold casts fireball on the night shift, feeds a dying soldier his own flesh, traumatizes his brother and proceeds to float out a window, Merry Poppins style.

So, I’m the DM and the party is raiding a mafia base filled with reptile humanoids, with the leading bos being Two-Toes Johnny, an Italian tortle.

The party has different curses, like Legends of Avantris. So they could be good, bad, or in between. Our happy little Kobold with a height insecurity got the curse of flames. So he is covered in fire and doesn’t take damage. The plan is to burn down the building, but naturally stealth fails, so he casts fly and bursts through the second story window.

What do ya know, he found the “night shift” (Troglodytes). As flames lick around the once pitch black room he sees eyes peering from the dark at him. So naturally, he’s scared, so with his gut reaction, he casts fireball in the small room.

But listen dear readers, imagine this from the troglodytes view. Your sleeping, when you wake up to glass shattering and light and flame peering into the room. Who is it? A flying kobold that is ablaze, not even injured. Is it god? Who knows, because he casts FIREBALL.

Two of them survive the blast, one almost dead leaning against the wall and the other charges at him through the flames, and bites him. The kobold then casts guiding bolt and puts him to the brink of death.

Now this is when the other party members say this, “He’s cooking alive, he looks kinda like a frog, TRY HIM.” Naturally he does, WHILE THE TROGLODYTES STILL ALIVE. He proceeds to spit it out landing on its face. In horror, it swallows its own flesh and dies.

The other troglodyte is terrified and looks on in horror. Then, the kobold decides to take ANOTHER piece of meat, and shoot it with another guiding bolt, trick shoting the meat of its brother on to its face. The troglodyte cries as it slides off his faces and screams, “WHY MUST YOU DO THE GOD!?!?”

Realizing his sudden change in status, the kobold decides he needs a follower, so he casts fly on it. But it’s a touch component, so he casts cure wounds then proceeds to burn a smiley face into it’s forehead to activate fly and as a branding.

Lizardfolk soldiers come rushing down the hallway and open the fire filled room after hearing the commotion. When the smoke clears and they can see, they watch in awe and confusion, as the troglodyte they’ve only seen once or twice, is floating out the window behind a kobold surrounded in flame.

In the end the building collapsed, and that’s where the session ended. And that was only part of the lunacy that happened in that session, so let me know if you want more. I can also speak of other horrors that the kobold has caused. That poor, poor fairy family…

TLDR; The stealth plan is no more, so naturally the kobold casts fireball on the night shift, feeds a dying soldier his own flesh, traumatizes his brother and proceeds to float out a window, Merry Poppins style.