Is heavy sexual tension usually felt by both people? /u/Diligent-Jury-8654 Sex

I have a male friend I’ve known since I was a child- he’s the brother of one of my best childhood friends. Before recently, I hadn’t seen him in years, until the last couple weeks for a work related event. We now work together, alone, for a few hours a week.

I wouldn’t necessarily say I’m attracted to him either, or that I want to have sex with him. When I actually think through the idea of having sex with him, I don’t really want that. Not to say that I don’t love him platonically- he’s always been like a brother to me. I had a huge crush on him when we were kids but that was around 20 years ago. I’ve always found him hilarious and love being around him, and he’s always been incredibly kind to me and looked out for me.

I have a hard time keeping eye contact with him because it’s too intense for me. Although I’m not technically attracted to him, it’s like my body finds him attractive. If we make eye contact when we’re talking, I forget what I’m talking about. I think he has too, he’s actually said so after keeping eye contact for a few moments before looking away to remember what he was talking about- but I can’t know for sure that that’s same thing as me.

I can only describe what I’m feeling as thick sexual tension. I can only know for sure that it was only what I experienced, but the tension was so thick it felt heavy. This was on top of stomach butterflies, and this bodily ache for him to touch me. It was purely a primal, physical thing, without even looking at him. Just being heavily aware of his presence and wanting him closer. When I’m not around him, I can’t stop thinking about him, but not in the typical crush/romantic/sexual feelings way. It’s like a physical hold his presence still has on my body.

But when I logically think about it- do I actually want any sexual contact? Am I actually genuinely sexually attracted to him? I don’t think so. Our relationship has always been very much platonic and all of the time we’ve spent alone as children and teenagers, nothing sexual or romantic ever happened. We had a pretty unique relationship for a long time, where it was platonic and we didn’t talk much but very protective of each other. Kinda like siblings.

I’ve never experienced anything like this before. I’ve been with lots of men and women, have been attracted to lots of men and women. But I’ve never felt this before. It’s almost primal, without thought. So what I want to know is, can something this heavy only be felt by one person? It seems like this level of chemistry would be felt by both parties but I don’t know exactly how it works.

I’m not going to act on it because it almost feels like that tension would be ruined if we actually had sex. I’m more curious about the odds of it being only felt by me, or if it’s likely felt by both of us.

Tldr; I feel heavy sexual tension when around a male friend that I don’t necessarily find attractive or want sex with- is it likely that he feels it too?

I have a male friend I’ve known since I was a child- he’s the brother of one of my best childhood friends. Before recently, I hadn’t seen him in years, until the last couple weeks for a work related event. We now work together, alone, for a few hours a week.

I wouldn’t necessarily say I’m attracted to him either, or that I want to have sex with him. When I actually think through the idea of having sex with him, I don’t really want that. Not to say that I don’t love him platonically- he’s always been like a brother to me. I had a huge crush on him when we were kids but that was around 20 years ago. I’ve always found him hilarious and love being around him, and he’s always been incredibly kind to me and looked out for me.

I have a hard time keeping eye contact with him because it’s too intense for me. Although I’m not technically attracted to him, it’s like my body finds him attractive. If we make eye contact when we’re talking, I forget what I’m talking about. I think he has too, he’s actually said so after keeping eye contact for a few moments before looking away to remember what he was talking about- but I can’t know for sure that that’s same thing as me.

I can only describe what I’m feeling as thick sexual tension. I can only know for sure that it was only what I experienced, but the tension was so thick it felt heavy. This was on top of stomach butterflies, and this bodily ache for him to touch me. It was purely a primal, physical thing, without even looking at him. Just being heavily aware of his presence and wanting him closer. When I’m not around him, I can’t stop thinking about him, but not in the typical crush/romantic/sexual feelings way. It’s like a physical hold his presence still has on my body.

But when I logically think about it- do I actually want any sexual contact? Am I actually genuinely sexually attracted to him? I don’t think so. Our relationship has always been very much platonic and all of the time we’ve spent alone as children and teenagers, nothing sexual or romantic ever happened. We had a pretty unique relationship for a long time, where it was platonic and we didn’t talk much but very protective of each other. Kinda like siblings.

I’ve never experienced anything like this before. I’ve been with lots of men and women, have been attracted to lots of men and women. But I’ve never felt this before. It’s almost primal, without thought. So what I want to know is, can something this heavy only be felt by one person? It seems like this level of chemistry would be felt by both parties but I don’t know exactly how it works.

I’m not going to act on it because it almost feels like that tension would be ruined if we actually had sex. I’m more curious about the odds of it being only felt by me, or if it’s likely felt by both of us.

Tldr; I feel heavy sexual tension when around a male friend that I don’t necessarily find attractive or want sex with- is it likely that he feels it too?