Just Venting….. WWYD? /u/Wonderful-Stomach-80 Sex

We keep friends and family out of our business, so I can only vent to you.

To make a very long story short, my partner and I have been seeing each other for less than a year. We met on social media and we also had mutual friends. Went on more than a couple of dates and have been together ever since. After about a couple of weeks of seeing each other, they invited me to visit their home. That visit turned into me living there 50% of the time. We work virtually and live hours apart.

Moving so fast caused us as a new couple to have let’s say…. married people problems. We’ve had power struggles, communication issues, and come from different backgrounds leading to differences in opinion. Overall all of our negative attributes/learned behavior has been put on the forefront in our relationship which is causing us to grow… painfully, but positively. Yet we still both choose each other.

Over time I’ve noticed their ego is extremely fragile. Something I’m not used to. This has resulted in a request to do something sexually we’ve both never have done before… within mutual comfortability. It’s something they said they request in every relationship to be done. Between the two of us and our past partners, I’d say we’ve covered most typical territory… Handcuffs, massages, car sex, anal plugs, vibrators, etc. It’s been made clear that this is my sole responsibility to come up with because of a sexual issue we’ve had in the past. It’s their breaking point. I have a strong feeling that I can’t really pinpoint or put words to and I especially don’t feel like sex should be a chore or homework to say the least… thoughts on the issue from both ends have been communicated thoroughly and typically is the source of an argument because of that.

Not only can I not come up with anything, I’ve thrown at least 5 ideas out there that have been shot down because it’s out of the comfort zone, etc. I feel at conflict about my feelings and theirs because honestly they do put the work in for our relationship to potentially thrive. I do too. We want the same things in life and we commit to each other.

It invalidates their feelings to say this, so I don’t out loud- but this just seems dumb as hell especially to end a relationship over. It makes me angry. Why make things so difficult? Why is this my sole responsibility? I hate that it’s even a ‘boundary’ or ‘need’. The root of the issue is ego and insecurity. It feels manipulative.

Breaking it off is easier at this point, but I don’t think the good things in life are necessarily easy either. I know everybody has their own boundaries and outlooks on relationships, but WWYD?

We keep friends and family out of our business, so I can only vent to you.

To make a very long story short, my partner and I have been seeing each other for less than a year. We met on social media and we also had mutual friends. Went on more than a couple of dates and have been together ever since. After about a couple of weeks of seeing each other, they invited me to visit their home. That visit turned into me living there 50% of the time. We work virtually and live hours apart.

Moving so fast caused us as a new couple to have let’s say…. married people problems. We’ve had power struggles, communication issues, and come from different backgrounds leading to differences in opinion. Overall all of our negative attributes/learned behavior has been put on the forefront in our relationship which is causing us to grow… painfully, but positively. Yet we still both choose each other.

Over time I’ve noticed their ego is extremely fragile. Something I’m not used to. This has resulted in a request to do something sexually we’ve both never have done before… within mutual comfortability. It’s something they said they request in every relationship to be done. Between the two of us and our past partners, I’d say we’ve covered most typical territory… Handcuffs, massages, car sex, anal plugs, vibrators, etc. It’s been made clear that this is my sole responsibility to come up with because of a sexual issue we’ve had in the past. It’s their breaking point. I have a strong feeling that I can’t really pinpoint or put words to and I especially don’t feel like sex should be a chore or homework to say the least… thoughts on the issue from both ends have been communicated thoroughly and typically is the source of an argument because of that.

Not only can I not come up with anything, I’ve thrown at least 5 ideas out there that have been shot down because it’s out of the comfort zone, etc. I feel at conflict about my feelings and theirs because honestly they do put the work in for our relationship to potentially thrive. I do too. We want the same things in life and we commit to each other.

It invalidates their feelings to say this, so I don’t out loud- but this just seems dumb as hell especially to end a relationship over. It makes me angry. Why make things so difficult? Why is this my sole responsibility? I hate that it’s even a ‘boundary’ or ‘need’. The root of the issue is ego and insecurity. It feels manipulative.

Breaking it off is easier at this point, but I don’t think the good things in life are necessarily easy either. I know everybody has their own boundaries and outlooks on relationships, but WWYD?