I’ll start by saying the advice I am looking is not who is right or who is wrong, or saying that my point of view is right. Instead I want to learn what is a healthy view on this and if I should shift my perspective and how to do so. For background we are both in our mid 30s, I’m F he is M.
I have become jealous of my partners masturbation.
It feels like we live completely different sex lives until a certain amount of time passes and he misses the real thing and we do it. I don’t feel like I know anymore what excites him, what fantasies are in his mind, what makes his heart pump.
I understand that sex can be a lot of effort and work, and I know masturbation is not the same and it’s your own time with yourself. I guess I just want a little bit of access, to a small part of it. That maybe we could masturbate together, or he would reach out to me just for a handjob, or he would tell me about how horny he was and he masturbated and shared that with me.
For example, when I go out with friends he always masturbates, and i don’t think it’s because he got horny and I wasn’t around, I think he got horny BECAUSE I wasn’t around.
Most nights I will be already in bed (I’m always game, btw) and he will go shower and masturbates, never talk about it, and when I try to make any suggestions of everything sexual he shows very little interest, because he already did it. I know because sometimes I straight up ask if he did, and I get a frustrated reply that yes and it’s none of my business.
And again, if we were having a rich sex life, with excitement and flirtition and I was part of his sexual world, I wouldn’t care less, damn I would’ve high fived him. But now I find myself jealous, and almost controlling, trying to figure out how often he is masturbating like I’m his mother and he is my teenage son trying to hide it.
Am I being unrealistic? What is a healthy outlook on the matter?
submitted by /u/Plastic-Tap3334
[link] [comments]
r/sex I’ll start by saying the advice I am looking is not who is right or who is wrong, or saying that my point of view is right. Instead I want to learn what is a healthy view on this and if I should shift my perspective and how to do so. For background we are both in our mid 30s, I’m F he is M. I have become jealous of my partners masturbation. It feels like we live completely different sex lives until a certain amount of time passes and he misses the real thing and we do it. I don’t feel like I know anymore what excites him, what fantasies are in his mind, what makes his heart pump. I understand that sex can be a lot of effort and work, and I know masturbation is not the same and it’s your own time with yourself. I guess I just want a little bit of access, to a small part of it. That maybe we could masturbate together, or he would reach out to me just for a handjob, or he would tell me about how horny he was and he masturbated and shared that with me. For example, when I go out with friends he always masturbates, and i don’t think it’s because he got horny and I wasn’t around, I think he got horny BECAUSE I wasn’t around. Most nights I will be already in bed (I’m always game, btw) and he will go shower and masturbates, never talk about it, and when I try to make any suggestions of everything sexual he shows very little interest, because he already did it. I know because sometimes I straight up ask if he did, and I get a frustrated reply that yes and it’s none of my business. And again, if we were having a rich sex life, with excitement and flirtition and I was part of his sexual world, I wouldn’t care less, damn I would’ve high fived him. But now I find myself jealous, and almost controlling, trying to figure out how often he is masturbating like I’m his mother and he is my teenage son trying to hide it. Am I being unrealistic? What is a healthy outlook on the matter? submitted by /u/Plastic-Tap3334 [link] [comments]
I’ll start by saying the advice I am looking is not who is right or who is wrong, or saying that my point of view is right. Instead I want to learn what is a healthy view on this and if I should shift my perspective and how to do so. For background we are both in our mid 30s, I’m F he is M.
I have become jealous of my partners masturbation.
It feels like we live completely different sex lives until a certain amount of time passes and he misses the real thing and we do it. I don’t feel like I know anymore what excites him, what fantasies are in his mind, what makes his heart pump.
I understand that sex can be a lot of effort and work, and I know masturbation is not the same and it’s your own time with yourself. I guess I just want a little bit of access, to a small part of it. That maybe we could masturbate together, or he would reach out to me just for a handjob, or he would tell me about how horny he was and he masturbated and shared that with me.
For example, when I go out with friends he always masturbates, and i don’t think it’s because he got horny and I wasn’t around, I think he got horny BECAUSE I wasn’t around.
Most nights I will be already in bed (I’m always game, btw) and he will go shower and masturbates, never talk about it, and when I try to make any suggestions of everything sexual he shows very little interest, because he already did it. I know because sometimes I straight up ask if he did, and I get a frustrated reply that yes and it’s none of my business.
And again, if we were having a rich sex life, with excitement and flirtition and I was part of his sexual world, I wouldn’t care less, damn I would’ve high fived him. But now I find myself jealous, and almost controlling, trying to figure out how often he is masturbating like I’m his mother and he is my teenage son trying to hide it.
Am I being unrealistic? What is a healthy outlook on the matter?
submitted by /u/Plastic-Tap3334
[link] [comments]