My GF is great, sex is not /u/HotWar8700 Sex

Hi, first of all, English is not my first language, i’m French, so, sorry in advance for the mistakes i could do

I (25m) met this (30f) girl 3 years ago after a very long previous relationship. and after few dates, i realized she was the perfect girl for me.

Now here’s the thing, she told me instantly that she wasn’t into sex that much, or at least penetration, but was really up for foreplay. Which sounded great for me because i always thought that penetration was cool but foreplay was the real deal.

So we start this relationship, everything is great, eventually we both fell in love, we do sexual stuff once in a while but i don’t complain because she warned me from the beginning that she wasn’t into it.

Fast forward, it’s been 3 years we are together, and i don’t know what to do anymore. Nothing is happening. We do stuff maybe once every 3 month, and by « stuff » i mean me going down on her (and i don’t doubt about my skills but her having a huge orgasm after 20 seconds of licking, i have a hard time believing she actually had an orgasm, it kinda sounds like her wanting to stop the thing by faking an orgasm) and right after it, she would jerk me off in a robotic way and ask me every 20 seconds « you’re about to finish, or? Because my hand is hurting. »

For a bit more of context, with my ex the sex was extremely kinky, once a day, we tried about every single thing possible, and it was amazing everytime (if i broke up with her and i’m with this girl now and since 3 years it’s for a reason tho, obviously, i don’t miss my ex but i would lie if i said i didn’t miss that type of sex, or at least real sex and not faking)

Everytime i tell her that maybe she is asexual, and that it’s totally ok, and that i would totally understand and even prefer if she was honest with me, she tells me « don’t worry, once we get married, sex will be awesome » but i have an hard time believing her. Why would a ring on her finger change the entire situation?

And it start to be hard for me because i go to the gym a lot now, i eat healthy, so my sex drive increased awfully the past few months, i’m tall and good looking so i have even more and more look from girls these days, which boost my ego and increase my sex drive even more. (I will absolutely never cheat on her, it’s not even a question) but i’m kinda lost at this point. Should i wait to see if things change? Should i tell her that it start to be very hard for me? Should i handle it and think about love and forget about sex for good?

Hi, first of all, English is not my first language, i’m French, so, sorry in advance for the mistakes i could do

I (25m) met this (30f) girl 3 years ago after a very long previous relationship. and after few dates, i realized she was the perfect girl for me.

Now here’s the thing, she told me instantly that she wasn’t into sex that much, or at least penetration, but was really up for foreplay. Which sounded great for me because i always thought that penetration was cool but foreplay was the real deal.

So we start this relationship, everything is great, eventually we both fell in love, we do sexual stuff once in a while but i don’t complain because she warned me from the beginning that she wasn’t into it.

Fast forward, it’s been 3 years we are together, and i don’t know what to do anymore. Nothing is happening. We do stuff maybe once every 3 month, and by « stuff » i mean me going down on her (and i don’t doubt about my skills but her having a huge orgasm after 20 seconds of licking, i have a hard time believing she actually had an orgasm, it kinda sounds like her wanting to stop the thing by faking an orgasm) and right after it, she would jerk me off in a robotic way and ask me every 20 seconds « you’re about to finish, or? Because my hand is hurting. »

For a bit more of context, with my ex the sex was extremely kinky, once a day, we tried about every single thing possible, and it was amazing everytime (if i broke up with her and i’m with this girl now and since 3 years it’s for a reason tho, obviously, i don’t miss my ex but i would lie if i said i didn’t miss that type of sex, or at least real sex and not faking)

Everytime i tell her that maybe she is asexual, and that it’s totally ok, and that i would totally understand and even prefer if she was honest with me, she tells me « don’t worry, once we get married, sex will be awesome » but i have an hard time believing her. Why would a ring on her finger change the entire situation?

And it start to be hard for me because i go to the gym a lot now, i eat healthy, so my sex drive increased awfully the past few months, i’m tall and good looking so i have even more and more look from girls these days, which boost my ego and increase my sex drive even more. (I will absolutely never cheat on her, it’s not even a question) but i’m kinda lost at this point. Should i wait to see if things change? Should i tell her that it start to be very hard for me? Should i handle it and think about love and forget about sex for good?