I always get sad and frustrated after sex and don’t know what to do /u/tuxedogray Sex

My boyfriend and I are long distance, and we rarely get to see one another. When we do get to be intimate, it’s always on a time crunch due to plans.

I’m on antidepressants and he finishes fast, so sometimes we just feel so incompatible. Before he finishes he’s so passionate and caring but as soon as he’s done he just completely falls out of it. I’ve spoken to him about it before and he’s told me it’s not on purpose, but I end up feeling so awkward that I’m still really aroused while he’s settling down.

It makes me feel so conflicted and upset with myself because on one hand it makes me happy he feels good but on another hand I just feel so guilty that I want more and lately I’ve never finished. We only ever see eachother maybe once or twice out of the month, so it often puts me in a bad mood and he picks up on it which causes more tension.

He does try to get me off but after he finishes I go through a big mental block and become so hyper aware of his actions that it never works. It doesn’t help that I can only finish through penetration and his refractory period is so long. I end up overthinking and tell myself that he’s just forcing himself to help me out.

I really don’t know what to do and it’s been eating at me. It just feels like it strains our time together but I really do love him and everything else is great. I have considered switching my antidepressants but with ssri’s it can be so hard to find ones that don’t cause so many side effects. Any advice would be appreciated!

My boyfriend and I are long distance, and we rarely get to see one another. When we do get to be intimate, it’s always on a time crunch due to plans.

I’m on antidepressants and he finishes fast, so sometimes we just feel so incompatible. Before he finishes he’s so passionate and caring but as soon as he’s done he just completely falls out of it. I’ve spoken to him about it before and he’s told me it’s not on purpose, but I end up feeling so awkward that I’m still really aroused while he’s settling down.

It makes me feel so conflicted and upset with myself because on one hand it makes me happy he feels good but on another hand I just feel so guilty that I want more and lately I’ve never finished. We only ever see eachother maybe once or twice out of the month, so it often puts me in a bad mood and he picks up on it which causes more tension.

He does try to get me off but after he finishes I go through a big mental block and become so hyper aware of his actions that it never works. It doesn’t help that I can only finish through penetration and his refractory period is so long. I end up overthinking and tell myself that he’s just forcing himself to help me out.

I really don’t know what to do and it’s been eating at me. It just feels like it strains our time together but I really do love him and everything else is great. I have considered switching my antidepressants but with ssri’s it can be so hard to find ones that don’t cause so many side effects. Any advice would be appreciated!