How often have you been able to orgasm through intercourse? /u/TheBerberian_ Sex

I am 39F and have barely ever been able to orgasm as a result of penetration, and never through a male partner giving me head no matter how into them I was.

When I say that I was barely able to orgasm as a result of penetration – it would typically be after my partner came, I would ask him to remain inside of me while I used a vibrator to make myself cum. I did feel self conscious doing it that way because I felt it was a chore for him to have to hang in there while I got myself off. I am no longer with that partner – we were together for almost 6 years but I never came through pure penetration or oral sex even when the sex was hot and novel at the beginning.

I have started to see someone casually. I will be seeing him again in a week or so, and I know we will have sex which I am looking forward to. We’ve had sex once and it was probably the best overall sex experience I’ve ever had, but I ended up faking coming because we had been at it for 45 mins+ – please don’t judge me – I faked my orgasm because I felt like he had done everything possible to get me there – foreplay for 30-45mins before even getting to sex to make sure I was well aroused – which btw I was very aroused and wet and then took our time to have sex for at least another 30 mins+.

Am I broken? How do you ladies communicate your needs? How do the men you are seeing react to feedback?

I am 39F and have barely ever been able to orgasm as a result of penetration, and never through a male partner giving me head no matter how into them I was.

When I say that I was barely able to orgasm as a result of penetration – it would typically be after my partner came, I would ask him to remain inside of me while I used a vibrator to make myself cum. I did feel self conscious doing it that way because I felt it was a chore for him to have to hang in there while I got myself off. I am no longer with that partner – we were together for almost 6 years but I never came through pure penetration or oral sex even when the sex was hot and novel at the beginning.

I have started to see someone casually. I will be seeing him again in a week or so, and I know we will have sex which I am looking forward to. We’ve had sex once and it was probably the best overall sex experience I’ve ever had, but I ended up faking coming because we had been at it for 45 mins+ – please don’t judge me – I faked my orgasm because I felt like he had done everything possible to get me there – foreplay for 30-45mins before even getting to sex to make sure I was well aroused – which btw I was very aroused and wet and then took our time to have sex for at least another 30 mins+.

Am I broken? How do you ladies communicate your needs? How do the men you are seeing react to feedback?