My Kink is causing me stress and now possible strain on relationship /u/United_Blacksmith_73 Sex

Let me start by saying my gf and I have been together for 5 years. She is my soulmate and i love her. I have never had serious thoughts cheating or anything like that. I love her but now i feel ashamed.

Before we met i used to post nudes here on reddit under a different account. I have an exhibitionist kink and it made me feel good at a time in my life when i was not in the greatest place. When i got into a serious relationship i ended everything.

The other day while bored and curious i googled my old reddit account. I know nudes once posted are nevee truly deleted but nothing showed up but i did find an old account on a porn site. It was nice going through the old photos. Then i did something so stupid. I posted a new nude. Seeing all the old views (thats all there was, likes and views no comments) it felt good and i waa curious so i posted a recent nude just to see if it would still do. It did but i felt way to guilty. It was such a stupid spur of the moment thing. I couldn’t handle it and deleted everything after a couple hours.

I am so embarrassed and it was such a moment of weakness. I was in therapy before, not related to this but anxiety/depression, but now looking to maybe get therapy or counseling specifically for this, i feel like my life has been a bit more crazy again and that is not an excuse but how do i proceed has anyone been here? How do i become a better boyfriend?

Thanks for reading.

Let me start by saying my gf and I have been together for 5 years. She is my soulmate and i love her. I have never had serious thoughts cheating or anything like that. I love her but now i feel ashamed.

Before we met i used to post nudes here on reddit under a different account. I have an exhibitionist kink and it made me feel good at a time in my life when i was not in the greatest place. When i got into a serious relationship i ended everything.

The other day while bored and curious i googled my old reddit account. I know nudes once posted are nevee truly deleted but nothing showed up but i did find an old account on a porn site. It was nice going through the old photos. Then i did something so stupid. I posted a new nude. Seeing all the old views (thats all there was, likes and views no comments) it felt good and i waa curious so i posted a recent nude just to see if it would still do. It did but i felt way to guilty. It was such a stupid spur of the moment thing. I couldn’t handle it and deleted everything after a couple hours.

I am so embarrassed and it was such a moment of weakness. I was in therapy before, not related to this but anxiety/depression, but now looking to maybe get therapy or counseling specifically for this, i feel like my life has been a bit more crazy again and that is not an excuse but how do i proceed has anyone been here? How do i become a better boyfriend?

Thanks for reading.