How much work should a blowjob be? /u/throwra_bfnobj Sex

Okay, I’ll try to explain the best I can – hopefully this is the right flair because I feel out of my depth.

I enjoy being around my boyfriend’s dick, and I go through a lot of motions that I enjoy when giving a blowjob – and I feel immersed and happy and generally think I do a good job showing I like it and at least making him feel somewhat good. I ask him to let me do it more than he asks me to – but that’s part of my worry.

It never makes him cum – I’ve managed twice in the nearly three years we’ve been fully together. It’s just a lot of work, and I have to keep a rhythm (I really struggle with this) and I find my own enjoyment goes down – or at least feels way different from what I’m used to. The only way I got him there recently, I literally half zoned out and was listening to a background Youtube video – not ideal in my opinion. Obviously the excitement of actually getting him there was enough to make it a highlight, but the journey just felt like so much work – and took a lot longer than I would have thought. Time’s kind of hard to judge but it felt like a long time to try to be consistent – and in most positions my arm or back or knees starts to hurt after a bit.

Am I just bad? Should I play rhythm games or something? Is it always like this and I’ve just managed to make giving blowjobs selfish during my attempts?

I always see people asking about certain techniques or gag reflexes and those aren’t the hugest concern right now (I mean, some posts/responses say “this will make him cum immediately” but I don’t think that’s possible with my man – and he does communicate when things feel exceptionally good, it’s just nothing but sustained rhythm is enough for cum). How do I keep up the consistency and is this just something I have to accept – that I can’t truthfully consider myself someone who likes giving blowjob, but rather someone who just likes playing with dick with my mouth?

Okay, I’ll try to explain the best I can – hopefully this is the right flair because I feel out of my depth.

I enjoy being around my boyfriend’s dick, and I go through a lot of motions that I enjoy when giving a blowjob – and I feel immersed and happy and generally think I do a good job showing I like it and at least making him feel somewhat good. I ask him to let me do it more than he asks me to – but that’s part of my worry.

It never makes him cum – I’ve managed twice in the nearly three years we’ve been fully together. It’s just a lot of work, and I have to keep a rhythm (I really struggle with this) and I find my own enjoyment goes down – or at least feels way different from what I’m used to. The only way I got him there recently, I literally half zoned out and was listening to a background Youtube video – not ideal in my opinion. Obviously the excitement of actually getting him there was enough to make it a highlight, but the journey just felt like so much work – and took a lot longer than I would have thought. Time’s kind of hard to judge but it felt like a long time to try to be consistent – and in most positions my arm or back or knees starts to hurt after a bit.

Am I just bad? Should I play rhythm games or something? Is it always like this and I’ve just managed to make giving blowjobs selfish during my attempts?

I always see people asking about certain techniques or gag reflexes and those aren’t the hugest concern right now (I mean, some posts/responses say “this will make him cum immediately” but I don’t think that’s possible with my man – and he does communicate when things feel exceptionally good, it’s just nothing but sustained rhythm is enough for cum). How do I keep up the consistency and is this just something I have to accept – that I can’t truthfully consider myself someone who likes giving blowjob, but rather someone who just likes playing with dick with my mouth?