Haven’t had sex in 5 months with my partner because I can’t get over something /u/rosesandtulips12 Sex

We’ve been in a relationship for about 2 years now. We’re both in our twenties. I’m in my early twenties and he’s in his late twenties.

Our sex life started to dry up because he had a low sex drive. That was fine but I still had a drive and my needs weren’t being met. I understood it because at the time, he was going through a tough time so I was patient. I stopped initiating sex because I could tell he didn’t want to anymore and figured when his drive came back he would say so. This lasted about 3-4 months.

Now he’s in a much better place and started initiating sex. But I keep declining. He mentioned to me that before this dry period, he sometimes felt pressured to have sex and would do so even though he didn’t want to. Now I’m very understanding when it comes to being rejected for sex. I’m a SA survivor so I really get it.

I’m not sure if it’s because I’m a SA survivor or if most people would have that stick with them. But now I feel like he’s only having sex with me because he wants to. I can’t bring myself to have sex with him. The thought of sex with him is now a turn off because I think he’s not into it but doing it for me.

I don’t know how to get over this. I don’t know if the pressure to have sex came from himself or something I did. I just keep thinking if we have sex, I’m having sex with someone who doesn’t want to do it. For the past month I keep coming up with excuses to not have sex and turn him down. I don’t want to be in a sexless relationship but it seems like that’s how it’s gonna be.

Any tips?

Also, sorry English is my second language so I’m sorry for any mistakes or grammar issues!

We’ve been in a relationship for about 2 years now. We’re both in our twenties. I’m in my early twenties and he’s in his late twenties.

Our sex life started to dry up because he had a low sex drive. That was fine but I still had a drive and my needs weren’t being met. I understood it because at the time, he was going through a tough time so I was patient. I stopped initiating sex because I could tell he didn’t want to anymore and figured when his drive came back he would say so. This lasted about 3-4 months.

Now he’s in a much better place and started initiating sex. But I keep declining. He mentioned to me that before this dry period, he sometimes felt pressured to have sex and would do so even though he didn’t want to. Now I’m very understanding when it comes to being rejected for sex. I’m a SA survivor so I really get it.

I’m not sure if it’s because I’m a SA survivor or if most people would have that stick with them. But now I feel like he’s only having sex with me because he wants to. I can’t bring myself to have sex with him. The thought of sex with him is now a turn off because I think he’s not into it but doing it for me.

I don’t know how to get over this. I don’t know if the pressure to have sex came from himself or something I did. I just keep thinking if we have sex, I’m having sex with someone who doesn’t want to do it. For the past month I keep coming up with excuses to not have sex and turn him down. I don’t want to be in a sexless relationship but it seems like that’s how it’s gonna be.

Any tips?

Also, sorry English is my second language so I’m sorry for any mistakes or grammar issues!