How to unlock my vanilla hubby? /u/Right_Organization87 Sex

I’m very kinky BDSM (33F) My hubby knows this about me we’ve been together 7 years and have a toddler Our sex life has really taken a blow (lol) starting with pregnancy tbh, but now that we’re getting back into it I’m realizing how much I’m craving more wild/fun/powerplay/passion etc.

I feel like somehow I can unlock his freaky side. But I’m starting to wonder if he’s hardwired vanilla?

Backstory: When we first started dating obviously lusty new love: things were a lil bit less vanilla-examples: – once he master bated over me in the shower while I rolled around being sexy and teasing him – once we role played I was his virgin little step sis and he had to teach me how to give head Stuff like that

But now it’s most just good sex.(it is good sex, don’t get me wrong, but its all fairly vanilla with maybe a finger in the butt here and there)

He has initiated sex with me like MAYBE 3 time in the last 3 years it feels like.. I am always the one initiating

I have tried talking about it, asked him about going to sex positive clubs, threesomes, more anal, more toys. I’ve asked so many times “what are your fantasies” And I’ve told him about mine All of this is being brought up by me, the conversations are carried by me, and it never leads to anything

I got him a candle 3 years ago that says “light this if you want your dick sucked” HE HAS NEVER LIT THE MFING CANDLE 😭 I even remind him about it

I know sometimes he jacks off to porn at night sometimes… so he has some sex drive right? But reddit has helped me see that maybe that’s just a way to relax without pressure and has less to do with sex drive? And maybe has nothing to do with me…

I want to unlock his feral masculine, I want him to devour me, i wanna be a slut for him

Any ideas how to get there from here? How to help him come out of his shell.. so he can cum in mine?

I’m very kinky BDSM (33F) My hubby knows this about me we’ve been together 7 years and have a toddler Our sex life has really taken a blow (lol) starting with pregnancy tbh, but now that we’re getting back into it I’m realizing how much I’m craving more wild/fun/powerplay/passion etc.

I feel like somehow I can unlock his freaky side. But I’m starting to wonder if he’s hardwired vanilla?

Backstory: When we first started dating obviously lusty new love: things were a lil bit less vanilla-examples: – once he master bated over me in the shower while I rolled around being sexy and teasing him – once we role played I was his virgin little step sis and he had to teach me how to give head Stuff like that

But now it’s most just good sex.(it is good sex, don’t get me wrong, but its all fairly vanilla with maybe a finger in the butt here and there)

He has initiated sex with me like MAYBE 3 time in the last 3 years it feels like.. I am always the one initiating

I have tried talking about it, asked him about going to sex positive clubs, threesomes, more anal, more toys. I’ve asked so many times “what are your fantasies” And I’ve told him about mine All of this is being brought up by me, the conversations are carried by me, and it never leads to anything

I got him a candle 3 years ago that says “light this if you want your dick sucked” HE HAS NEVER LIT THE MFING CANDLE 😭 I even remind him about it

I know sometimes he jacks off to porn at night sometimes… so he has some sex drive right? But reddit has helped me see that maybe that’s just a way to relax without pressure and has less to do with sex drive? And maybe has nothing to do with me…

I want to unlock his feral masculine, I want him to devour me, i wanna be a slut for him

Any ideas how to get there from here? How to help him come out of his shell.. so he can cum in mine?