About a year ago I was cleaning the house and found very large dildos and butt plugs in a bag in our storage room. This prompted me to go through my husbands computer (ik it’s not okay to invade your partners privacy but give me a break) and found he also had been watching trans porn and looking up stuff on Reddit about where he could find prostitutes on a business trip he went on to Thailand.
I confronted him when he got home from work that day and he swore up and down that he had not solicited a prostitute on his trip. He admitted that he enjoyed anal stimulation (we’d experimented with rim jobs and a couple fingers up there in the past) and gay porn. Of course I had a mental breakdown because this all was very shocking and he had never given me the slightest hint that he would be capable of cheating before.
After the mental breakdown we had a long talk about how we needed to communicate better and get all our secrets off our chest then and there. I admitted to him I’d faked every orgasm in the 6 years we’d been together. Obviously he was devastated. We proceeded to have probably the best sex of our whole marriage and I showed him how exactly I need to be pleasured even if it doesn’t necessarily lead to an orgasm.
About a year has passed since then and nothing has progressed past that point. A month after our talk he went back to the way we’d always had sex before. No foreplay. No cunninglus. No aftercare. Occasionally using vibrators but never without me also having to please him at the same time. I can’t cum when I’m focused on someone else. I cant cum in front of anyone in general because I’m so focused on making sure they’re satisfied.
I don’t know what to do at this point because I can’t keep having dissociative pleasureless sex. We don’t communicate. He told me that he doesn’t like to focus too much on me because he zeros in on making me cum and when I don’t he gets discouraged and in his head. Understandable. I know it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have lied.
He has even suggested pegging and that secretly just infuriated me and made me more resentful because that would just make sex even more pleasurable for him while I continue to get nothing out of it. I don’t want to do it.
He’s also opposed to any kind of therapy as the whole situation is really embarrassing to him.
Tl;dr: found my husbands dildos and an attempt to find prostitutes. Confessed to him that he’s never made me cum. Nothing has changed since and I feel more like his sex toy everyday.
submitted by /u/EitherComplaint130
[link] [comments]
r/sex About a year ago I was cleaning the house and found very large dildos and butt plugs in a bag in our storage room. This prompted me to go through my husbands computer (ik it’s not okay to invade your partners privacy but give me a break) and found he also had been watching trans porn and looking up stuff on Reddit about where he could find prostitutes on a business trip he went on to Thailand. I confronted him when he got home from work that day and he swore up and down that he had not solicited a prostitute on his trip. He admitted that he enjoyed anal stimulation (we’d experimented with rim jobs and a couple fingers up there in the past) and gay porn. Of course I had a mental breakdown because this all was very shocking and he had never given me the slightest hint that he would be capable of cheating before. After the mental breakdown we had a long talk about how we needed to communicate better and get all our secrets off our chest then and there. I admitted to him I’d faked every orgasm in the 6 years we’d been together. Obviously he was devastated. We proceeded to have probably the best sex of our whole marriage and I showed him how exactly I need to be pleasured even if it doesn’t necessarily lead to an orgasm. About a year has passed since then and nothing has progressed past that point. A month after our talk he went back to the way we’d always had sex before. No foreplay. No cunninglus. No aftercare. Occasionally using vibrators but never without me also having to please him at the same time. I can’t cum when I’m focused on someone else. I cant cum in front of anyone in general because I’m so focused on making sure they’re satisfied. I don’t know what to do at this point because I can’t keep having dissociative pleasureless sex. We don’t communicate. He told me that he doesn’t like to focus too much on me because he zeros in on making me cum and when I don’t he gets discouraged and in his head. Understandable. I know it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have lied. He has even suggested pegging and that secretly just infuriated me and made me more resentful because that would just make sex even more pleasurable for him while I continue to get nothing out of it. I don’t want to do it. He’s also opposed to any kind of therapy as the whole situation is really embarrassing to him. Tl;dr: found my husbands dildos and an attempt to find prostitutes. Confessed to him that he’s never made me cum. Nothing has changed since and I feel more like his sex toy everyday. submitted by /u/EitherComplaint130 [link] [comments]
About a year ago I was cleaning the house and found very large dildos and butt plugs in a bag in our storage room. This prompted me to go through my husbands computer (ik it’s not okay to invade your partners privacy but give me a break) and found he also had been watching trans porn and looking up stuff on Reddit about where he could find prostitutes on a business trip he went on to Thailand.
I confronted him when he got home from work that day and he swore up and down that he had not solicited a prostitute on his trip. He admitted that he enjoyed anal stimulation (we’d experimented with rim jobs and a couple fingers up there in the past) and gay porn. Of course I had a mental breakdown because this all was very shocking and he had never given me the slightest hint that he would be capable of cheating before.
After the mental breakdown we had a long talk about how we needed to communicate better and get all our secrets off our chest then and there. I admitted to him I’d faked every orgasm in the 6 years we’d been together. Obviously he was devastated. We proceeded to have probably the best sex of our whole marriage and I showed him how exactly I need to be pleasured even if it doesn’t necessarily lead to an orgasm.
About a year has passed since then and nothing has progressed past that point. A month after our talk he went back to the way we’d always had sex before. No foreplay. No cunninglus. No aftercare. Occasionally using vibrators but never without me also having to please him at the same time. I can’t cum when I’m focused on someone else. I cant cum in front of anyone in general because I’m so focused on making sure they’re satisfied.
I don’t know what to do at this point because I can’t keep having dissociative pleasureless sex. We don’t communicate. He told me that he doesn’t like to focus too much on me because he zeros in on making me cum and when I don’t he gets discouraged and in his head. Understandable. I know it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have lied.
He has even suggested pegging and that secretly just infuriated me and made me more resentful because that would just make sex even more pleasurable for him while I continue to get nothing out of it. I don’t want to do it.
He’s also opposed to any kind of therapy as the whole situation is really embarrassing to him.
Tl;dr: found my husbands dildos and an attempt to find prostitutes. Confessed to him that he’s never made me cum. Nothing has changed since and I feel more like his sex toy everyday.
submitted by /u/EitherComplaint130
[link] [comments]