how do I get my kinks back? /u/Patient-Ad-4274 Sex

I had a bunch of different kinks and my bf shared them, but when it includes something rough you know there is always something that can go wrong.

sooo, everything was fine, but despite us talking a lot about our borders and limits we still had our “oh that was too much” moment when he kinda crossed the line. obviously, this happens when you try to figure out things, but it was definitely unpleasant and kinda scary, for both of us. just in case – that was a total accident and he meant nothing bad, just that he suddenly choked me too hard.

after this incident I cried a bit, and decided that it’s not a huge awful deal, like, it affected me, but not to the point of arguing/having a breakdown etc. however, the main problem – I feel like those kinks of mine disappeared. I don’t want anything of that kind, just a very vanilla sex or no sex at all.

I know it’s probably a reasonable reaction, but I need to know how to get this interest and passion back, what do we need to discuss or is it something I need to change inside of me. I’m lowkey scared of him touching my neck, but our relationship stays as healthy and wholesome as possible for us. just that I just don’t feel any need in sex, I don’t even think about it as usual. or, maybe, I don’t even know how to react to this so I can’t feel anything for now.

tldr: we crossed the line and now I am not eligible for a horny jail

I had a bunch of different kinks and my bf shared them, but when it includes something rough you know there is always something that can go wrong.

sooo, everything was fine, but despite us talking a lot about our borders and limits we still had our “oh that was too much” moment when he kinda crossed the line. obviously, this happens when you try to figure out things, but it was definitely unpleasant and kinda scary, for both of us. just in case – that was a total accident and he meant nothing bad, just that he suddenly choked me too hard.

after this incident I cried a bit, and decided that it’s not a huge awful deal, like, it affected me, but not to the point of arguing/having a breakdown etc. however, the main problem – I feel like those kinks of mine disappeared. I don’t want anything of that kind, just a very vanilla sex or no sex at all.

I know it’s probably a reasonable reaction, but I need to know how to get this interest and passion back, what do we need to discuss or is it something I need to change inside of me. I’m lowkey scared of him touching my neck, but our relationship stays as healthy and wholesome as possible for us. just that I just don’t feel any need in sex, I don’t even think about it as usual. or, maybe, I don’t even know how to react to this so I can’t feel anything for now.

tldr: we crossed the line and now I am not eligible for a horny jail