This is going to be quite lengthy so I apologise in advance.
I’ve recently come to a stalemate with my boyfriend. I’ve told him I’m fed up with him not working on the issues he brings to the relationship (this being one), and I’m actively working on mine & seem to be held to a higher standard by him.
He’s admitted he’s addicted to masturbating and he used to do it upto 14 times a day. He’s explained why: it’s a hit of dopamine. I don’t have an issue with the act itself, I do it too! There underlying issues are as follows:
He’s openly admitted that he never uses my nudes for it (big ouch to the self esteem there), this truly hurt my feelings as with how bad his addiction is, how can he never use mine? Now I know it won’t be every time of course, I’m not every woman/body shape etc & fantasies differ but, it knocked me so far back
He follows tons of twitter nfsw models, not just their main twitters but private, smaller accounts like almost accessible to him and I’ve brought this up before to say it makes me uncomfortable to be met with anger for looking at his twitter followers and push back. If you add his seemingly obsession with certain models + his lack of use for my nudes, I hope you can see that this is really disheartening sexually, and I’ve expressed that
I also found out last year that he keeps old nudes and sex videos of exes and masturbates to them, I deleted them off of his phone to much anger from him. Again, another blowback
The fact that he’s so narrow thinking and selfish with his actions makes me wonder if he looks at other girls he knows and can contact like this, I know I can’t be everything to him but I’d like to at least be enough sometimes.
He claims he’s trying to cut back but follows more and more twitter nsfw models, he’s joined porn discords & actively subscribes to peoples onlyfans. I’ve said to him that this isn’t looking like progress to me & he shuts me down.
I know it can be difficult but I feel as though the strain it’s putting on my self esteem and sexual interest in the relationship is severely disregarded and I’m wondering how any of you have communicated this to your partners?
I’m not a completely confident person as it is, I had body dysmorphia and a recovering anorexic. Now I know it’s not up to him 100% to handle my self confidence issues but I guess I’d like to be validated in what I feel and that I’m not being unreasonable. I don’t want him to stop, it’s healthy to do so, but I can’t go on like this and feeling second best all the time.
Thanks for reading.
submitted by /u/keggle0
[link] [comments]
r/sex This is going to be quite lengthy so I apologise in advance. I’ve recently come to a stalemate with my boyfriend. I’ve told him I’m fed up with him not working on the issues he brings to the relationship (this being one), and I’m actively working on mine & seem to be held to a higher standard by him. He’s admitted he’s addicted to masturbating and he used to do it upto 14 times a day. He’s explained why: it’s a hit of dopamine. I don’t have an issue with the act itself, I do it too! There underlying issues are as follows: He’s openly admitted that he never uses my nudes for it (big ouch to the self esteem there), this truly hurt my feelings as with how bad his addiction is, how can he never use mine? Now I know it won’t be every time of course, I’m not every woman/body shape etc & fantasies differ but, it knocked me so far back He follows tons of twitter nfsw models, not just their main twitters but private, smaller accounts like almost accessible to him and I’ve brought this up before to say it makes me uncomfortable to be met with anger for looking at his twitter followers and push back. If you add his seemingly obsession with certain models + his lack of use for my nudes, I hope you can see that this is really disheartening sexually, and I’ve expressed that I also found out last year that he keeps old nudes and sex videos of exes and masturbates to them, I deleted them off of his phone to much anger from him. Again, another blowback The fact that he’s so narrow thinking and selfish with his actions makes me wonder if he looks at other girls he knows and can contact like this, I know I can’t be everything to him but I’d like to at least be enough sometimes. He claims he’s trying to cut back but follows more and more twitter nsfw models, he’s joined porn discords & actively subscribes to peoples onlyfans. I’ve said to him that this isn’t looking like progress to me & he shuts me down. I know it can be difficult but I feel as though the strain it’s putting on my self esteem and sexual interest in the relationship is severely disregarded and I’m wondering how any of you have communicated this to your partners? I’m not a completely confident person as it is, I had body dysmorphia and a recovering anorexic. Now I know it’s not up to him 100% to handle my self confidence issues but I guess I’d like to be validated in what I feel and that I’m not being unreasonable. I don’t want him to stop, it’s healthy to do so, but I can’t go on like this and feeling second best all the time. Thanks for reading. submitted by /u/keggle0 [link] [comments]
This is going to be quite lengthy so I apologise in advance.
I’ve recently come to a stalemate with my boyfriend. I’ve told him I’m fed up with him not working on the issues he brings to the relationship (this being one), and I’m actively working on mine & seem to be held to a higher standard by him.
He’s admitted he’s addicted to masturbating and he used to do it upto 14 times a day. He’s explained why: it’s a hit of dopamine. I don’t have an issue with the act itself, I do it too! There underlying issues are as follows:
He’s openly admitted that he never uses my nudes for it (big ouch to the self esteem there), this truly hurt my feelings as with how bad his addiction is, how can he never use mine? Now I know it won’t be every time of course, I’m not every woman/body shape etc & fantasies differ but, it knocked me so far back
He follows tons of twitter nfsw models, not just their main twitters but private, smaller accounts like almost accessible to him and I’ve brought this up before to say it makes me uncomfortable to be met with anger for looking at his twitter followers and push back. If you add his seemingly obsession with certain models + his lack of use for my nudes, I hope you can see that this is really disheartening sexually, and I’ve expressed that
I also found out last year that he keeps old nudes and sex videos of exes and masturbates to them, I deleted them off of his phone to much anger from him. Again, another blowback
The fact that he’s so narrow thinking and selfish with his actions makes me wonder if he looks at other girls he knows and can contact like this, I know I can’t be everything to him but I’d like to at least be enough sometimes.
He claims he’s trying to cut back but follows more and more twitter nsfw models, he’s joined porn discords & actively subscribes to peoples onlyfans. I’ve said to him that this isn’t looking like progress to me & he shuts me down.
I know it can be difficult but I feel as though the strain it’s putting on my self esteem and sexual interest in the relationship is severely disregarded and I’m wondering how any of you have communicated this to your partners?
I’m not a completely confident person as it is, I had body dysmorphia and a recovering anorexic. Now I know it’s not up to him 100% to handle my self confidence issues but I guess I’d like to be validated in what I feel and that I’m not being unreasonable. I don’t want him to stop, it’s healthy to do so, but I can’t go on like this and feeling second best all the time.
Thanks for reading.
submitted by /u/keggle0
[link] [comments]