Struggling to find ‘alone time’ for anal play /u/Visible_Lettuce_3238 Sex

I am a 36M and I have been with my wife for 15+ years. I have quite a sexually active mind and I’m always thinking of new avenues of sexual exploration.

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One thing I have been exploring is anal play. I do this almost exclusively in my limited alone time, when my wife is out at an event or staying away somewhere. I want to find what I like and don’t like, which includes things like depth play. It takes a lot to prep for and can be quite lengthy in time (and other senses of the word) but the sessions are so rewarding for me.

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We spend so much time together when we’re at home, so I find my alone time quite limited. My wife and I have explored pegging during our sessions with good success, but we enjoy PIV sex so much that despite prep, I often skip over the pegging part which leads to disappointment after a session is over, despite how mind blowing PIV is for us. My wife also finds some of the heavier toys difficult to manoeuvre around, so we tend to use smaller toys for our joint sessions.

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I don’t know if slow, depth play is something that we’re both into during a session. I quite like to be in control and have the comfort of exploring it alone, but I don’t want to shut my wife out. On the flip side, I don’t know if I want an audience, or anyone in the house either…

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Is there any advice out there on what could be a good middle ground for both of us? Or more preferably, do other couples have ‘alone time’ to explore sexual activities solo that they have agreed? I want to approach this topic with my wife soon but it would be good to hear what others do so I can use them as examples.

​

Thanks

I am a 36M and I have been with my wife for 15+ years. I have quite a sexually active mind and I’m always thinking of new avenues of sexual exploration.

​

One thing I have been exploring is anal play. I do this almost exclusively in my limited alone time, when my wife is out at an event or staying away somewhere. I want to find what I like and don’t like, which includes things like depth play. It takes a lot to prep for and can be quite lengthy in time (and other senses of the word) but the sessions are so rewarding for me.

​

We spend so much time together when we’re at home, so I find my alone time quite limited. My wife and I have explored pegging during our sessions with good success, but we enjoy PIV sex so much that despite prep, I often skip over the pegging part which leads to disappointment after a session is over, despite how mind blowing PIV is for us. My wife also finds some of the heavier toys difficult to manoeuvre around, so we tend to use smaller toys for our joint sessions.

​

I don’t know if slow, depth play is something that we’re both into during a session. I quite like to be in control and have the comfort of exploring it alone, but I don’t want to shut my wife out. On the flip side, I don’t know if I want an audience, or anyone in the house either…

​

Is there any advice out there on what could be a good middle ground for both of us? Or more preferably, do other couples have ‘alone time’ to explore sexual activities solo that they have agreed? I want to approach this topic with my wife soon but it would be good to hear what others do so I can use them as examples.

​

Thanks