I (27f) have been dating my boyfriend (32m) for almost two years. And in that two years we have never had PIV sex. I give him oral, and he just uses his hands and has only given me oral once. Basically the issue is that every time he’s about to put it in, he goes soft. But doesn’t have an issue with blowjobs. I’ve tried to talk to him about it a few times and he said all the “it’s not you I promise, I love you and am attracted to you” and that this all started to become an issue after he and his ex-wife got a divorce (she cheated on him). He’s mentioned doing some research on things he can do to work on it but hasn’t actually tried to do anything about it. He says it’s anxiety, stress, afraid to get me pregnant, etc. He’s also told me that it’s not a priority to him to work on it and he doesn’t believe in taking any pills, and is too prideful to seek professional help. Basically, He’s content with the status of our current physical relationship and I’m not. I don’t pressure him, and I’ve been incredibly patient and understanding but I don’t know how much longer I can wait. Sex isn’t the MOST important part of a relationship to me, but it is important. It’s the intimacy that I want. but now I’m just starting to feel like even after 4 years of being divorced from his ex-wife, he still has unresolved feelings towards her, and I’m never going to be enough. He shows me love and makes me feel loved in other ways, I don’t doubt that he loves me, but deep down I can’t help but feel like if his ex wife wanted to come back into his life, sex wouldn’t be an issue for him. I don’t know how much longer I can wait and I feel awful for considering ending things simply because we don’t have sex. Any advice?
submitted by /u/NotAMasterpiece
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r/sex I (27f) have been dating my boyfriend (32m) for almost two years. And in that two years we have never had PIV sex. I give him oral, and he just uses his hands and has only given me oral once. Basically the issue is that every time he’s about to put it in, he goes soft. But doesn’t have an issue with blowjobs. I’ve tried to talk to him about it a few times and he said all the “it’s not you I promise, I love you and am attracted to you” and that this all started to become an issue after he and his ex-wife got a divorce (she cheated on him). He’s mentioned doing some research on things he can do to work on it but hasn’t actually tried to do anything about it. He says it’s anxiety, stress, afraid to get me pregnant, etc. He’s also told me that it’s not a priority to him to work on it and he doesn’t believe in taking any pills, and is too prideful to seek professional help. Basically, He’s content with the status of our current physical relationship and I’m not. I don’t pressure him, and I’ve been incredibly patient and understanding but I don’t know how much longer I can wait. Sex isn’t the MOST important part of a relationship to me, but it is important. It’s the intimacy that I want. but now I’m just starting to feel like even after 4 years of being divorced from his ex-wife, he still has unresolved feelings towards her, and I’m never going to be enough. He shows me love and makes me feel loved in other ways, I don’t doubt that he loves me, but deep down I can’t help but feel like if his ex wife wanted to come back into his life, sex wouldn’t be an issue for him. I don’t know how much longer I can wait and I feel awful for considering ending things simply because we don’t have sex. Any advice? submitted by /u/NotAMasterpiece [link] [comments]
I (27f) have been dating my boyfriend (32m) for almost two years. And in that two years we have never had PIV sex. I give him oral, and he just uses his hands and has only given me oral once. Basically the issue is that every time he’s about to put it in, he goes soft. But doesn’t have an issue with blowjobs. I’ve tried to talk to him about it a few times and he said all the “it’s not you I promise, I love you and am attracted to you” and that this all started to become an issue after he and his ex-wife got a divorce (she cheated on him). He’s mentioned doing some research on things he can do to work on it but hasn’t actually tried to do anything about it. He says it’s anxiety, stress, afraid to get me pregnant, etc. He’s also told me that it’s not a priority to him to work on it and he doesn’t believe in taking any pills, and is too prideful to seek professional help. Basically, He’s content with the status of our current physical relationship and I’m not. I don’t pressure him, and I’ve been incredibly patient and understanding but I don’t know how much longer I can wait. Sex isn’t the MOST important part of a relationship to me, but it is important. It’s the intimacy that I want. but now I’m just starting to feel like even after 4 years of being divorced from his ex-wife, he still has unresolved feelings towards her, and I’m never going to be enough. He shows me love and makes me feel loved in other ways, I don’t doubt that he loves me, but deep down I can’t help but feel like if his ex wife wanted to come back into his life, sex wouldn’t be an issue for him. I don’t know how much longer I can wait and I feel awful for considering ending things simply because we don’t have sex. Any advice?
submitted by /u/NotAMasterpiece
[link] [comments]