So this all really started when I was pregnant last year. When I got to my third trimester my belly was so big it made everything in my life awkward, including sex. My husband and I were both getting off but we couldn’t grind like he likes so he started turning me down for sex. I asked him why he kept saying no, his response being “it’s just too awkward”. I didn’t like it but I did my best to respect it. I knew that after the baby was born and I was healed our sex life would return to normal. While I was pregnant he also started sleeping on the couch claiming it was better for his back or I was hitting him in my sleep. Again I didn’t like it but I wanted to respect it. I gave birth and we had sex again four weeks later while I was still healing because I needed that connection with him. I had spent 2 and a half months celibate and not by choice. We were having sex again but he was still sleeping on the couch practically every night. One night while getting up with the newborn I needed a change of his clothes so I went to find it in the clean laundry in the living room. I walked in on my husband jacking off while looking at his phone. I didn’t say anything in that moment but it hurt. Another night I couldn’t sleep and I looked through his phone. Found out he subscribed to only fans and started buying content while I had been in my first trimester. I had a panic attack. We talked about it later that day and I explained how I felt. That I was being replaced by porn, he didn’t find me attractive, I’m not a priority. That I was insulted he bought porn when there’s and me, a real woman, in the next room. We had a huge fight. At one part of the argument he told me I know his password and can log into any of his accounts at any time I want. My compromise was I didn’t mind if he watches it while I’m not home, but please try to bring all the lovin to me first when I am home. I didn’t say anything about him deleting his onlyfans account but he did. He said he agreed to make me a priority when he has an itch that needs scratched. I tried to move on and put it out of my mind but it was difficult. Our sex life continued and he was sleeping in bed with me again. Then an illness went through the home. First him, then the kids, then me. I’m sick and horny and for a few days of my illness he started turning me down again. I logged into his browser and found he would wait for me to leave with the kids so he could watch porn before he left for work. I had made plenty of passes in the mornings before I got out of bed and he turned me down so he could watch porn after I left? I brought this up to him and he became very defensive. Asking me to just let it go and saying it’s all in my head.
I confessed to him I’m struggling with post partum depression/ ppd (again) and this time it’s about me being insecure with my new mom body. All the woman he searches for are fit and lean and I’m not. I don’t have the schedule to work out all the time. I feel inadequate and that he doesn’t care about what I need from him ie. Him agreeing to come to me first with his urges and prioritizing me sexually. I feel like I’m starting to drown and I need his help and support but I feel like he doesn’t care since he’s still not making me a priority over porn. I’m tired of fighting over this. I did get emotional and tell him to just do whatever he wants and he doesn’t need to worry about what I want or need within our marriage. But I meant it. Instead of getting the support I need from him I’ll focus on finding it within myself which will only make me struggle more. I’ll focus on myself and the kids and he can do whatever he wants. He initiated sex last night but he also downloaded bing and has been using that this morning instead of google. makes me think he is doing whatever he wants, he’s just trying to hide it better. I don’t know what to do or how to fix this. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this depression. I could go to therapy but it would be couples therapy and he’s already been vocal that therapy is not something he would ever do himself.
Edit to add that after we started fighting about it, he said he needed to Jack off on the couch because he has a high sex drive and has to clear his head before he can do anything else like sleep or just go about his day. I have a high sex drive too. That’s kind of how our relationship started.
submitted by /u/Ok_Statement146
[link] [comments]
r/sex So this all really started when I was pregnant last year. When I got to my third trimester my belly was so big it made everything in my life awkward, including sex. My husband and I were both getting off but we couldn’t grind like he likes so he started turning me down for sex. I asked him why he kept saying no, his response being “it’s just too awkward”. I didn’t like it but I did my best to respect it. I knew that after the baby was born and I was healed our sex life would return to normal. While I was pregnant he also started sleeping on the couch claiming it was better for his back or I was hitting him in my sleep. Again I didn’t like it but I wanted to respect it. I gave birth and we had sex again four weeks later while I was still healing because I needed that connection with him. I had spent 2 and a half months celibate and not by choice. We were having sex again but he was still sleeping on the couch practically every night. One night while getting up with the newborn I needed a change of his clothes so I went to find it in the clean laundry in the living room. I walked in on my husband jacking off while looking at his phone. I didn’t say anything in that moment but it hurt. Another night I couldn’t sleep and I looked through his phone. Found out he subscribed to only fans and started buying content while I had been in my first trimester. I had a panic attack. We talked about it later that day and I explained how I felt. That I was being replaced by porn, he didn’t find me attractive, I’m not a priority. That I was insulted he bought porn when there’s and me, a real woman, in the next room. We had a huge fight. At one part of the argument he told me I know his password and can log into any of his accounts at any time I want. My compromise was I didn’t mind if he watches it while I’m not home, but please try to bring all the lovin to me first when I am home. I didn’t say anything about him deleting his onlyfans account but he did. He said he agreed to make me a priority when he has an itch that needs scratched. I tried to move on and put it out of my mind but it was difficult. Our sex life continued and he was sleeping in bed with me again. Then an illness went through the home. First him, then the kids, then me. I’m sick and horny and for a few days of my illness he started turning me down again. I logged into his browser and found he would wait for me to leave with the kids so he could watch porn before he left for work. I had made plenty of passes in the mornings before I got out of bed and he turned me down so he could watch porn after I left? I brought this up to him and he became very defensive. Asking me to just let it go and saying it’s all in my head. I confessed to him I’m struggling with post partum depression/ ppd (again) and this time it’s about me being insecure with my new mom body. All the woman he searches for are fit and lean and I’m not. I don’t have the schedule to work out all the time. I feel inadequate and that he doesn’t care about what I need from him ie. Him agreeing to come to me first with his urges and prioritizing me sexually. I feel like I’m starting to drown and I need his help and support but I feel like he doesn’t care since he’s still not making me a priority over porn. I’m tired of fighting over this. I did get emotional and tell him to just do whatever he wants and he doesn’t need to worry about what I want or need within our marriage. But I meant it. Instead of getting the support I need from him I’ll focus on finding it within myself which will only make me struggle more. I’ll focus on myself and the kids and he can do whatever he wants. He initiated sex last night but he also downloaded bing and has been using that this morning instead of google. makes me think he is doing whatever he wants, he’s just trying to hide it better. I don’t know what to do or how to fix this. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this depression. I could go to therapy but it would be couples therapy and he’s already been vocal that therapy is not something he would ever do himself. Edit to add that after we started fighting about it, he said he needed to Jack off on the couch because he has a high sex drive and has to clear his head before he can do anything else like sleep or just go about his day. I have a high sex drive too. That’s kind of how our relationship started. submitted by /u/Ok_Statement146 [link] [comments]
So this all really started when I was pregnant last year. When I got to my third trimester my belly was so big it made everything in my life awkward, including sex. My husband and I were both getting off but we couldn’t grind like he likes so he started turning me down for sex. I asked him why he kept saying no, his response being “it’s just too awkward”. I didn’t like it but I did my best to respect it. I knew that after the baby was born and I was healed our sex life would return to normal. While I was pregnant he also started sleeping on the couch claiming it was better for his back or I was hitting him in my sleep. Again I didn’t like it but I wanted to respect it. I gave birth and we had sex again four weeks later while I was still healing because I needed that connection with him. I had spent 2 and a half months celibate and not by choice. We were having sex again but he was still sleeping on the couch practically every night. One night while getting up with the newborn I needed a change of his clothes so I went to find it in the clean laundry in the living room. I walked in on my husband jacking off while looking at his phone. I didn’t say anything in that moment but it hurt. Another night I couldn’t sleep and I looked through his phone. Found out he subscribed to only fans and started buying content while I had been in my first trimester. I had a panic attack. We talked about it later that day and I explained how I felt. That I was being replaced by porn, he didn’t find me attractive, I’m not a priority. That I was insulted he bought porn when there’s and me, a real woman, in the next room. We had a huge fight. At one part of the argument he told me I know his password and can log into any of his accounts at any time I want. My compromise was I didn’t mind if he watches it while I’m not home, but please try to bring all the lovin to me first when I am home. I didn’t say anything about him deleting his onlyfans account but he did. He said he agreed to make me a priority when he has an itch that needs scratched. I tried to move on and put it out of my mind but it was difficult. Our sex life continued and he was sleeping in bed with me again. Then an illness went through the home. First him, then the kids, then me. I’m sick and horny and for a few days of my illness he started turning me down again. I logged into his browser and found he would wait for me to leave with the kids so he could watch porn before he left for work. I had made plenty of passes in the mornings before I got out of bed and he turned me down so he could watch porn after I left? I brought this up to him and he became very defensive. Asking me to just let it go and saying it’s all in my head.
I confessed to him I’m struggling with post partum depression/ ppd (again) and this time it’s about me being insecure with my new mom body. All the woman he searches for are fit and lean and I’m not. I don’t have the schedule to work out all the time. I feel inadequate and that he doesn’t care about what I need from him ie. Him agreeing to come to me first with his urges and prioritizing me sexually. I feel like I’m starting to drown and I need his help and support but I feel like he doesn’t care since he’s still not making me a priority over porn. I’m tired of fighting over this. I did get emotional and tell him to just do whatever he wants and he doesn’t need to worry about what I want or need within our marriage. But I meant it. Instead of getting the support I need from him I’ll focus on finding it within myself which will only make me struggle more. I’ll focus on myself and the kids and he can do whatever he wants. He initiated sex last night but he also downloaded bing and has been using that this morning instead of google. makes me think he is doing whatever he wants, he’s just trying to hide it better. I don’t know what to do or how to fix this. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this depression. I could go to therapy but it would be couples therapy and he’s already been vocal that therapy is not something he would ever do himself.
Edit to add that after we started fighting about it, he said he needed to Jack off on the couch because he has a high sex drive and has to clear his head before he can do anything else like sleep or just go about his day. I have a high sex drive too. That’s kind of how our relationship started.
submitted by /u/Ok_Statement146
[link] [comments]