My husband and I are in a very loving relationship and have been married for almost 7 years. We spend a lot of time together and hardly ever argue.
We used to have a lot of sex and I’m always really open and positive about trying new things. I even introduced pegging to him and he loves it, we have several toys we share together, I dress up for him, watch porn together.. etc. We used to have a lot of fun.
In the last year or two however he has seemed to have lost his sex drive, as we hardly have any sex and when we do he ‘loses’ it and sometimes it will end with me giving him a blow job.
I’ve caught him before looking up ‘trans’ porn and I addressed it with him and we talked it through and moved on, this was years ago. I can understand why he’d be embarrassed about it but I did not shame him or accuse him of being gay or anything like that.
I’ve always been the one to get off on satisfying my partner so when sexy time falls short I’m upset but mainly for him. I try to talk to him and ask him what I can do, and yes I admit that sometimes I’ve accused him of not being attracted to me anymore or just bored.
We’ve had endless conversations and I try to get him to talk to me. I’m desperate to help him, but he tells me he’s just stressed or tired and can’t perform and that it’s not my fault. He just won’t open up.
6 months ago we went on a trip together to my home country where I extended my stay a bit longer than him to spend more time with my family, leaving him home alone for 3.5 weeks.
A few months later I’m tidying up around the house and I find a massive butt plug, Chasity cage, and even stockings hidden away. He ordered these items the DAY that he got home from our trip.
The time between our trip and when I found this stash (6 months) we’ve had sex maybe once a month. It’s really upsetting how many times I’ve tried to talk to him and express how lonely and undesirable I feel, and he just refuses to talk to me or even try to make me feel better, he just gets angry and accuses me of pressuring him or wanting to leave him. I’m trim and don’t believe I’m ugly or anything but the lack of intimacy was already really getting to me.
I’m not stupid, I know guys mastberate. I would even ask if he was while I was at work and that’s why we don’t have sex. He insists he doesn’t do that ever, he’s just not feeling sexy.
Now I’ve found this kink that he hid from me and obviously used while I was away.. I don’t even know how many times since, as he works from home. I feel utterly heartbroken and betrayed and I don’t know what to do.
Sure, yes, I admit I was snooping a bit but that’s because it has been nearly two years with little to no sex life and he refuses to talk to me, so something is wrong.
I’m most upset not so much about the kink, but because he felt like he couldn’t talk to me when I’ve been so open and supportive of the other things we’ve been into, not to mention I am the one that introduced anal play to him and am always happy to do for him.
If I try to talk to him without admitting I found it he will just lie and give me the same excuses and we will carry on not having an intimate relationship. But if I tell him what I found and know, he will likely feel embarrassed and upset that I was snooping around. I love him and want us to be happy, but also I just want to fuck my husband.
submitted by /u/boobydollbby
[link] [comments]
r/sex My husband and I are in a very loving relationship and have been married for almost 7 years. We spend a lot of time together and hardly ever argue. We used to have a lot of sex and I’m always really open and positive about trying new things. I even introduced pegging to him and he loves it, we have several toys we share together, I dress up for him, watch porn together.. etc. We used to have a lot of fun. In the last year or two however he has seemed to have lost his sex drive, as we hardly have any sex and when we do he ‘loses’ it and sometimes it will end with me giving him a blow job. I’ve caught him before looking up ‘trans’ porn and I addressed it with him and we talked it through and moved on, this was years ago. I can understand why he’d be embarrassed about it but I did not shame him or accuse him of being gay or anything like that. I’ve always been the one to get off on satisfying my partner so when sexy time falls short I’m upset but mainly for him. I try to talk to him and ask him what I can do, and yes I admit that sometimes I’ve accused him of not being attracted to me anymore or just bored. We’ve had endless conversations and I try to get him to talk to me. I’m desperate to help him, but he tells me he’s just stressed or tired and can’t perform and that it’s not my fault. He just won’t open up. 6 months ago we went on a trip together to my home country where I extended my stay a bit longer than him to spend more time with my family, leaving him home alone for 3.5 weeks. A few months later I’m tidying up around the house and I find a massive butt plug, Chasity cage, and even stockings hidden away. He ordered these items the DAY that he got home from our trip. The time between our trip and when I found this stash (6 months) we’ve had sex maybe once a month. It’s really upsetting how many times I’ve tried to talk to him and express how lonely and undesirable I feel, and he just refuses to talk to me or even try to make me feel better, he just gets angry and accuses me of pressuring him or wanting to leave him. I’m trim and don’t believe I’m ugly or anything but the lack of intimacy was already really getting to me. I’m not stupid, I know guys mastberate. I would even ask if he was while I was at work and that’s why we don’t have sex. He insists he doesn’t do that ever, he’s just not feeling sexy. Now I’ve found this kink that he hid from me and obviously used while I was away.. I don’t even know how many times since, as he works from home. I feel utterly heartbroken and betrayed and I don’t know what to do. Sure, yes, I admit I was snooping a bit but that’s because it has been nearly two years with little to no sex life and he refuses to talk to me, so something is wrong. I’m most upset not so much about the kink, but because he felt like he couldn’t talk to me when I’ve been so open and supportive of the other things we’ve been into, not to mention I am the one that introduced anal play to him and am always happy to do for him. If I try to talk to him without admitting I found it he will just lie and give me the same excuses and we will carry on not having an intimate relationship. But if I tell him what I found and know, he will likely feel embarrassed and upset that I was snooping around. I love him and want us to be happy, but also I just want to fuck my husband. submitted by /u/boobydollbby [link] [comments]
My husband and I are in a very loving relationship and have been married for almost 7 years. We spend a lot of time together and hardly ever argue.
We used to have a lot of sex and I’m always really open and positive about trying new things. I even introduced pegging to him and he loves it, we have several toys we share together, I dress up for him, watch porn together.. etc. We used to have a lot of fun.
In the last year or two however he has seemed to have lost his sex drive, as we hardly have any sex and when we do he ‘loses’ it and sometimes it will end with me giving him a blow job.
I’ve caught him before looking up ‘trans’ porn and I addressed it with him and we talked it through and moved on, this was years ago. I can understand why he’d be embarrassed about it but I did not shame him or accuse him of being gay or anything like that.
I’ve always been the one to get off on satisfying my partner so when sexy time falls short I’m upset but mainly for him. I try to talk to him and ask him what I can do, and yes I admit that sometimes I’ve accused him of not being attracted to me anymore or just bored.
We’ve had endless conversations and I try to get him to talk to me. I’m desperate to help him, but he tells me he’s just stressed or tired and can’t perform and that it’s not my fault. He just won’t open up.
6 months ago we went on a trip together to my home country where I extended my stay a bit longer than him to spend more time with my family, leaving him home alone for 3.5 weeks.
A few months later I’m tidying up around the house and I find a massive butt plug, Chasity cage, and even stockings hidden away. He ordered these items the DAY that he got home from our trip.
The time between our trip and when I found this stash (6 months) we’ve had sex maybe once a month. It’s really upsetting how many times I’ve tried to talk to him and express how lonely and undesirable I feel, and he just refuses to talk to me or even try to make me feel better, he just gets angry and accuses me of pressuring him or wanting to leave him. I’m trim and don’t believe I’m ugly or anything but the lack of intimacy was already really getting to me.
I’m not stupid, I know guys mastberate. I would even ask if he was while I was at work and that’s why we don’t have sex. He insists he doesn’t do that ever, he’s just not feeling sexy.
Now I’ve found this kink that he hid from me and obviously used while I was away.. I don’t even know how many times since, as he works from home. I feel utterly heartbroken and betrayed and I don’t know what to do.
Sure, yes, I admit I was snooping a bit but that’s because it has been nearly two years with little to no sex life and he refuses to talk to me, so something is wrong.
I’m most upset not so much about the kink, but because he felt like he couldn’t talk to me when I’ve been so open and supportive of the other things we’ve been into, not to mention I am the one that introduced anal play to him and am always happy to do for him.
If I try to talk to him without admitting I found it he will just lie and give me the same excuses and we will carry on not having an intimate relationship. But if I tell him what I found and know, he will likely feel embarrassed and upset that I was snooping around. I love him and want us to be happy, but also I just want to fuck my husband.
submitted by /u/boobydollbby
[link] [comments]