I cry during penetrative sex almost every time I have it and idk what to do anymore /u/Thr0wAwAy45610 Sex

Basically the title, but I’ll add more to it.

I’m a 21 AFAB trans guy, and I used to be a borderline sex addict (told by a trauma therapist – not Google dw). Since getting into a steady, committed relationship just over 3 years ago, I have gotten a lot better and very rarely get urges. In fact – I’m kind of the opposite of what I used to be, and I don’t know what happened. I can probably count on both hands how many times I’ve had sex over the last 6 months and still have fingers left to spare. It’s ridiculous and frustrating.

Anyway – back to the main point of this post.

Penetrative sex is now difficult for me for a few reasons. One of the big ones being I start to kind of, idk…it’s like I start to freak out a bit. One minute I’ll be into it; the next – it feels like my upper body is tense and tingly, my throat starts to get tight, my head feels numb, I start to cry, and then I have to stop and collect myself. It doesn’t even have to be sex with my partner. It also happens if I masturbate with a dildo. It’s gotten so bad.

This has happened to me a few times before as a teen, but only two or three times, and only when masturbating. I’d never had it happen during sex before up until about a year or two ago. I can tell the difference between crying with pleasure/sensory overwhelm and, well, whatever tf this is. It’s embarrassing (hence the throwaway), exhausting, and I truly don’t know what to do anymore. Not that it’s anybody’s job, but does anybody here have any possible answers as to why this happens? Or even just the same/a similar experience?

Basically the title, but I’ll add more to it.

I’m a 21 AFAB trans guy, and I used to be a borderline sex addict (told by a trauma therapist – not Google dw). Since getting into a steady, committed relationship just over 3 years ago, I have gotten a lot better and very rarely get urges. In fact – I’m kind of the opposite of what I used to be, and I don’t know what happened. I can probably count on both hands how many times I’ve had sex over the last 6 months and still have fingers left to spare. It’s ridiculous and frustrating.

Anyway – back to the main point of this post.

Penetrative sex is now difficult for me for a few reasons. One of the big ones being I start to kind of, idk…it’s like I start to freak out a bit. One minute I’ll be into it; the next – it feels like my upper body is tense and tingly, my throat starts to get tight, my head feels numb, I start to cry, and then I have to stop and collect myself. It doesn’t even have to be sex with my partner. It also happens if I masturbate with a dildo. It’s gotten so bad.

This has happened to me a few times before as a teen, but only two or three times, and only when masturbating. I’d never had it happen during sex before up until about a year or two ago. I can tell the difference between crying with pleasure/sensory overwhelm and, well, whatever tf this is. It’s embarrassing (hence the throwaway), exhausting, and I truly don’t know what to do anymore. Not that it’s anybody’s job, but does anybody here have any possible answers as to why this happens? Or even just the same/a similar experience?