Feeling very anxious that I am not fulfilling my boyfriends sexual needs /u/PurpleFerret9146 Sex

I am 20 and have recently started dating a man quite a bit older than me but the topic of sex has been putting a lot of pressure on my mind.

I am definitely deep into the asexual spectrum and haven’t had sex yet, and wasn’t particularly interested to for a long time. My stance was always that if I am in a relationship with a non asexual (which is the overwhelming majority so the odds aren’t in my favour) I would still want to do it with them to please them. I want to outline that I don’t find the idea of sex off putting or disgusting, I just feel very neutral as I simply don’t feel sexual desire, so I would not be suffering having sex with someone I love.

Now that I am in my first relationship I feel a lot of self inflicted pressure to please my boyfriend. He has an overwhelming quantity of experience so I feel that someone so sexually inept as me could never measure up.

In spite of him always reassuring me that we don’t need to do anything and that he just wants me for me in whichever form I am ready for that to be in, I just can’t help but feel sad that I will not be able to fulfil his needs.

I want to have sex with him to make him feel good and not because I feel like it’s the convention, but the thought of pleasing him in this way is genuinely the closest I’ve probably come to arousal.

Still I don’t feel it’s enough and I know I wouldn’t be able to do it regularly, then there is also all the anxiety about me wanting to impress him when he has seen so much already.

I am 20 and have recently started dating a man quite a bit older than me but the topic of sex has been putting a lot of pressure on my mind.

I am definitely deep into the asexual spectrum and haven’t had sex yet, and wasn’t particularly interested to for a long time. My stance was always that if I am in a relationship with a non asexual (which is the overwhelming majority so the odds aren’t in my favour) I would still want to do it with them to please them. I want to outline that I don’t find the idea of sex off putting or disgusting, I just feel very neutral as I simply don’t feel sexual desire, so I would not be suffering having sex with someone I love.

Now that I am in my first relationship I feel a lot of self inflicted pressure to please my boyfriend. He has an overwhelming quantity of experience so I feel that someone so sexually inept as me could never measure up.

In spite of him always reassuring me that we don’t need to do anything and that he just wants me for me in whichever form I am ready for that to be in, I just can’t help but feel sad that I will not be able to fulfil his needs.

I want to have sex with him to make him feel good and not because I feel like it’s the convention, but the thought of pleasing him in this way is genuinely the closest I’ve probably come to arousal.

Still I don’t feel it’s enough and I know I wouldn’t be able to do it regularly, then there is also all the anxiety about me wanting to impress him when he has seen so much already.