is it unreasonable of me to feel this way? /u/sjweirdquestioner Sex

My (30m) gf (31m) and I have been together for 10 years. Lately, things have been really rough (cheating in one form or multiple) but we are trying to work things out. Idk if that is even relevant here tbh. I just felt like including it might be necessary.

The actual question: My gf has developed this relationship with coworkers that apparently involves them going out, drinking, and discussing our sex lives. Months ago, I found a sealed sex toy in my girlfriends backpack, and I ignored it because I honestly thought it was a surprise for us, for a trip we had planned. The surprise never showed during the trip.

During some heated discussion, I finally asked what that toy was all about and where it came from. She said her coworkers bought it for her. I’m sure she will say it was a female coworker, but consider the cheating I don’t feel I am out of line for questioning that even.

Is it fair, or inappropriate and controlling of me to not be okay with my gf having that sort of relationship with her coworkers? I don’t feel comfortable with her coworkers apparently knowing so much about or sex life that they for (regardless of who, gender, intention etc) some reason felt it necessary to buy her a sex toy. That seems really weird to me, makes me uncomfortable, feel my privacy is intruded on, and hinestly seems just like an inappropriate work relationship.

That said, are these relationships completely innocent and normal amongst women in the work place? Am I out of line and need to check myself here?

Please be nice, and reasonable. I am here asking for a reason, not to attack anyone. I want to better myself.

Thanks!

My (30m) gf (31m) and I have been together for 10 years. Lately, things have been really rough (cheating in one form or multiple) but we are trying to work things out. Idk if that is even relevant here tbh. I just felt like including it might be necessary.

The actual question: My gf has developed this relationship with coworkers that apparently involves them going out, drinking, and discussing our sex lives. Months ago, I found a sealed sex toy in my girlfriends backpack, and I ignored it because I honestly thought it was a surprise for us, for a trip we had planned. The surprise never showed during the trip.

During some heated discussion, I finally asked what that toy was all about and where it came from. She said her coworkers bought it for her. I’m sure she will say it was a female coworker, but consider the cheating I don’t feel I am out of line for questioning that even.

Is it fair, or inappropriate and controlling of me to not be okay with my gf having that sort of relationship with her coworkers? I don’t feel comfortable with her coworkers apparently knowing so much about or sex life that they for (regardless of who, gender, intention etc) some reason felt it necessary to buy her a sex toy. That seems really weird to me, makes me uncomfortable, feel my privacy is intruded on, and hinestly seems just like an inappropriate work relationship.

That said, are these relationships completely innocent and normal amongst women in the work place? Am I out of line and need to check myself here?

Please be nice, and reasonable. I am here asking for a reason, not to attack anyone. I want to better myself.

Thanks!