I lose interest in them after sex and it’s ruining my relationships /u/LostInTheCuntry Sex

I’ve been pretty active sexually since I was 16. Lost it to a guy I loved w all my heart but things got toxic so it ended eventually.

I had my hoe-phase for good 2 years and not once fell for anybody. It was basically for a “feel-good-factor”.

A few years later, I started talking to a guy (who lived in a different city). I had butterflies, fell madly in love and was desperate to meet him. In a few months we did meet and it was like a dream. HOWEVER, as we got down to have sex, it was like a switch went on and I just lost interest in him as well as the moment. I thought it was probably because I was distracted but I actually wasn’t. We had sex again the next day and all I wanted was for him to vum so we can get done w it. I still liked him but for some reason I didn’t feel it. And to be clear, we had a lot of phone sex (which was amazing) and he too was great in bed. The sad part is that we did long distance for 3 years and the more sex we had (both, irl & online) the more I pushed it away and just wanted him to get done w it. Eventually I had to end it because I lost interest in him and tho I was attached to him, I just didn’t love him anymore and that broke my heart.

It’s been about a year since the break up and I decided it’s time to go out there when I started hitting it off with a mutual. The hype was great but the moment we got down to having sex, I wanted to be done with it and just didn’t want to continue. Regardless, I did and while it felt great, I completely lost interest in him. We drifted apart post that because I didn’t want to drag myself into a relationship with a guy I didn’t like.

Now before I’m told that I might be into girls, let me tell you that I am. I’m bisexual and have been intimate with girls but have never fallen for one; I’ve always fallen for men. My sexual experiences with women have been phenomenal but for some reason the emotions lack.

I have a very high libido and absolutely love being sexually intimate. In fact, affectionate sex turns me on big time. However when it finally happens and I lose interest, it bums me out. I really want to be interested and not come off as an uptight person in bed but once the switch is turned on, I can never turn it off for some reason.

Why has this started happening and what can I do about it?

PS: I don’t have any sex trauma, instead I’ve had some great experiences.

I’ve been pretty active sexually since I was 16. Lost it to a guy I loved w all my heart but things got toxic so it ended eventually.

I had my hoe-phase for good 2 years and not once fell for anybody. It was basically for a “feel-good-factor”.

A few years later, I started talking to a guy (who lived in a different city). I had butterflies, fell madly in love and was desperate to meet him. In a few months we did meet and it was like a dream. HOWEVER, as we got down to have sex, it was like a switch went on and I just lost interest in him as well as the moment. I thought it was probably because I was distracted but I actually wasn’t. We had sex again the next day and all I wanted was for him to vum so we can get done w it. I still liked him but for some reason I didn’t feel it. And to be clear, we had a lot of phone sex (which was amazing) and he too was great in bed. The sad part is that we did long distance for 3 years and the more sex we had (both, irl & online) the more I pushed it away and just wanted him to get done w it. Eventually I had to end it because I lost interest in him and tho I was attached to him, I just didn’t love him anymore and that broke my heart.

It’s been about a year since the break up and I decided it’s time to go out there when I started hitting it off with a mutual. The hype was great but the moment we got down to having sex, I wanted to be done with it and just didn’t want to continue. Regardless, I did and while it felt great, I completely lost interest in him. We drifted apart post that because I didn’t want to drag myself into a relationship with a guy I didn’t like.

Now before I’m told that I might be into girls, let me tell you that I am. I’m bisexual and have been intimate with girls but have never fallen for one; I’ve always fallen for men. My sexual experiences with women have been phenomenal but for some reason the emotions lack.

I have a very high libido and absolutely love being sexually intimate. In fact, affectionate sex turns me on big time. However when it finally happens and I lose interest, it bums me out. I really want to be interested and not come off as an uptight person in bed but once the switch is turned on, I can never turn it off for some reason.

Why has this started happening and what can I do about it?

PS: I don’t have any sex trauma, instead I’ve had some great experiences.