My older sister exclusively does one night stands while I exclusively have sex in committed relationships. We both seem to have fulfilling sex lives so as long as everyone is happy and healthy then it’s all good. But I started thinking about it recently and went down a spiral.
I don’t know the normal sequence of events that leads to a one night stand. I do know that my sister goes out to clubs with the intention to drink and find someone to go home with that night and then wake up in the morning and never see them again. I was taught that consent was not only a yes but also a sober yes, an informed yes, a sane yes, and many more modifiers. If you met the person just a few hours ago and likely both have been drinking then is it possible to give or receive full consent?
Neither are sober. There is likely little to no conversation about sexual history (STDs and trauma). She isn’t on contraceptives so is that mentioned? What to do in an oops situation where she gets unexpectedly pregnant, is he in anyway responsible? She feels more comfortable going to the man’s home since she says it’s easier to leave than to get someone to leave her home. Is that safe? There have also been times when a man texts her for weeks afterward wanting more (even just a date) but she always says she made it clear what she wanted. Does he regret their encounter because he lacked the mental state to make an informed choice or did he think she was lying about her intentions? And in either case, did he really give informed consent?
TL:DR What constitutes full consent and is it even possible to give/receive full consent in a one night stand situation where the people involved never met before?
submitted by /u/haley4221
[link] [comments]
r/sex My older sister exclusively does one night stands while I exclusively have sex in committed relationships. We both seem to have fulfilling sex lives so as long as everyone is happy and healthy then it’s all good. But I started thinking about it recently and went down a spiral. I don’t know the normal sequence of events that leads to a one night stand. I do know that my sister goes out to clubs with the intention to drink and find someone to go home with that night and then wake up in the morning and never see them again. I was taught that consent was not only a yes but also a sober yes, an informed yes, a sane yes, and many more modifiers. If you met the person just a few hours ago and likely both have been drinking then is it possible to give or receive full consent? Neither are sober. There is likely little to no conversation about sexual history (STDs and trauma). She isn’t on contraceptives so is that mentioned? What to do in an oops situation where she gets unexpectedly pregnant, is he in anyway responsible? She feels more comfortable going to the man’s home since she says it’s easier to leave than to get someone to leave her home. Is that safe? There have also been times when a man texts her for weeks afterward wanting more (even just a date) but she always says she made it clear what she wanted. Does he regret their encounter because he lacked the mental state to make an informed choice or did he think she was lying about her intentions? And in either case, did he really give informed consent? TL:DR What constitutes full consent and is it even possible to give/receive full consent in a one night stand situation where the people involved never met before? submitted by /u/haley4221 [link] [comments]
My older sister exclusively does one night stands while I exclusively have sex in committed relationships. We both seem to have fulfilling sex lives so as long as everyone is happy and healthy then it’s all good. But I started thinking about it recently and went down a spiral.
I don’t know the normal sequence of events that leads to a one night stand. I do know that my sister goes out to clubs with the intention to drink and find someone to go home with that night and then wake up in the morning and never see them again. I was taught that consent was not only a yes but also a sober yes, an informed yes, a sane yes, and many more modifiers. If you met the person just a few hours ago and likely both have been drinking then is it possible to give or receive full consent?
Neither are sober. There is likely little to no conversation about sexual history (STDs and trauma). She isn’t on contraceptives so is that mentioned? What to do in an oops situation where she gets unexpectedly pregnant, is he in anyway responsible? She feels more comfortable going to the man’s home since she says it’s easier to leave than to get someone to leave her home. Is that safe? There have also been times when a man texts her for weeks afterward wanting more (even just a date) but she always says she made it clear what she wanted. Does he regret their encounter because he lacked the mental state to make an informed choice or did he think she was lying about her intentions? And in either case, did he really give informed consent?
TL:DR What constitutes full consent and is it even possible to give/receive full consent in a one night stand situation where the people involved never met before?
submitted by /u/haley4221
[link] [comments]