I am 24F dating 28M for three years. We have mostly beautiful relationship – we support each other, we can talk for hours, we share pretty much amazingly compatible point of view and we love each other a lot. I live in another city because I am still a student and we see each other during the weekends (I partly already live at his place) and he usually visits me once a week in between (it’s an hour drive and we usually go out to have some drinks since I don’t have my own flat). For the first two years my boyfriend had very high libido – we could be walking in park and he would get hard just by kissing there for example. I never really had high libido and was usually just there for the ride – it was the same with my ex. I would enjoy it, especially if he turned me on before, but I rarely initiated it. But about a year ago my bf’s libido drastically changed. At first I was concerned it had something to do with him not wanting to be with me anymore but that turned out not true – he seemed very much satisfied with our relationship. I started mentioning my concerns quite often (which was not the smartest move) – there was crying, there was serious talk, there was nice encouragement etc etc. Over the year, my bf got it that this is something that makes me anxious – so he tries, I can see it. I try too – I wait for him in some new sexy lingerie and it will be an instant turn on for him. But I can’t stop feeling like it is all a bit staged. Like we have to remember to have sex. After it we are always happy, talking about what was good, how we should do it more often etc. When we talk about it my boyfriend is never worried. His arguments are that we are together for a long time, that we only see each other for weekends, that we both have busy lives (he is a doctor, I am a med student – with chronic insomnia which makes some of my days quite hard). Now I really want to except the fact that we just happen to both have low libido and that it is good that we found each other – but I just worry. I worry that something is wrong with us, I feel like everyone thinks about sex all the time and that my bf used to think about sex all the time – and now something is off, like we are the only people not obsessed with sex.
Tl;dr me and my partner both have a low libido and it worries me
submitted by /u/whatifthatsit
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r/sex I am 24F dating 28M for three years. We have mostly beautiful relationship – we support each other, we can talk for hours, we share pretty much amazingly compatible point of view and we love each other a lot. I live in another city because I am still a student and we see each other during the weekends (I partly already live at his place) and he usually visits me once a week in between (it’s an hour drive and we usually go out to have some drinks since I don’t have my own flat). For the first two years my boyfriend had very high libido – we could be walking in park and he would get hard just by kissing there for example. I never really had high libido and was usually just there for the ride – it was the same with my ex. I would enjoy it, especially if he turned me on before, but I rarely initiated it. But about a year ago my bf’s libido drastically changed. At first I was concerned it had something to do with him not wanting to be with me anymore but that turned out not true – he seemed very much satisfied with our relationship. I started mentioning my concerns quite often (which was not the smartest move) – there was crying, there was serious talk, there was nice encouragement etc etc. Over the year, my bf got it that this is something that makes me anxious – so he tries, I can see it. I try too – I wait for him in some new sexy lingerie and it will be an instant turn on for him. But I can’t stop feeling like it is all a bit staged. Like we have to remember to have sex. After it we are always happy, talking about what was good, how we should do it more often etc. When we talk about it my boyfriend is never worried. His arguments are that we are together for a long time, that we only see each other for weekends, that we both have busy lives (he is a doctor, I am a med student – with chronic insomnia which makes some of my days quite hard). Now I really want to except the fact that we just happen to both have low libido and that it is good that we found each other – but I just worry. I worry that something is wrong with us, I feel like everyone thinks about sex all the time and that my bf used to think about sex all the time – and now something is off, like we are the only people not obsessed with sex. Tl;dr me and my partner both have a low libido and it worries me submitted by /u/whatifthatsit [link] [comments]
I am 24F dating 28M for three years. We have mostly beautiful relationship – we support each other, we can talk for hours, we share pretty much amazingly compatible point of view and we love each other a lot. I live in another city because I am still a student and we see each other during the weekends (I partly already live at his place) and he usually visits me once a week in between (it’s an hour drive and we usually go out to have some drinks since I don’t have my own flat). For the first two years my boyfriend had very high libido – we could be walking in park and he would get hard just by kissing there for example. I never really had high libido and was usually just there for the ride – it was the same with my ex. I would enjoy it, especially if he turned me on before, but I rarely initiated it. But about a year ago my bf’s libido drastically changed. At first I was concerned it had something to do with him not wanting to be with me anymore but that turned out not true – he seemed very much satisfied with our relationship. I started mentioning my concerns quite often (which was not the smartest move) – there was crying, there was serious talk, there was nice encouragement etc etc. Over the year, my bf got it that this is something that makes me anxious – so he tries, I can see it. I try too – I wait for him in some new sexy lingerie and it will be an instant turn on for him. But I can’t stop feeling like it is all a bit staged. Like we have to remember to have sex. After it we are always happy, talking about what was good, how we should do it more often etc. When we talk about it my boyfriend is never worried. His arguments are that we are together for a long time, that we only see each other for weekends, that we both have busy lives (he is a doctor, I am a med student – with chronic insomnia which makes some of my days quite hard). Now I really want to except the fact that we just happen to both have low libido and that it is good that we found each other – but I just worry. I worry that something is wrong with us, I feel like everyone thinks about sex all the time and that my bf used to think about sex all the time – and now something is off, like we are the only people not obsessed with sex.
Tl;dr me and my partner both have a low libido and it worries me
submitted by /u/whatifthatsit
[link] [comments]