Advice for a couple where there is a physical difference and one is inexperienced? /u/CrazyWorriedWriter Sex

ETA: Tried to remove “where there is a physical difference” from title, but couldn’t. I realized while writing this that the height difference probably wasn’t the issue.

I (23F) recently started dating someone (25M) and had an interesting encounter – I’ll try not to make this too long.

I definitely feel like I’m the more experienced one when it comes to sex, although I also don’t have A LOT of experience. Last night, things got a little steamy with my bf and I for the first time, and things were going really well at first. He was up front about the fact that he hasn’t had much sexual experience, which is fine with me – everyone has a first time, or even just a first time in a while, and sometimes helping someone figure out what they like can make it more fun (all he said was that he didn’t have much experience, so I don’t know exactly what that meant). I think this is also where the problem came in, though.

Once we got to trying intercourse, it just… didn’t work. My first thought was that it could be our height difference (I’m 5’3″, he’s probably about a foot taller than me), but I’ve had sex with men of similar height before. It kind of seemed like he just didn’t really know what to do. We tried missionary first and I tried to direct him to aim down a bit more (more towards my back rather than straight forward), but whatever he was doing just wasn’t working. I tried getting on top and I think that would have worked fine, although at that point he was getting softer due to nerves and we eventually went back to just cuddling and touching and the like.

Overall, we both agreed that it was still a positive experience – at the end of the day we both had fun and felt good. I think he was a little embarrassed, but I assured him that he had no reason to be and I still enjoyed the experience.

I guess I’m just looking for some advice about how we could both improve next time. How can I help him understand what to do without sounding condescending, and does anyone any tips for how I can help him figure out what he likes? TIA!

ETA: Tried to remove “where there is a physical difference” from title, but couldn’t. I realized while writing this that the height difference probably wasn’t the issue.

I (23F) recently started dating someone (25M) and had an interesting encounter – I’ll try not to make this too long.

I definitely feel like I’m the more experienced one when it comes to sex, although I also don’t have A LOT of experience. Last night, things got a little steamy with my bf and I for the first time, and things were going really well at first. He was up front about the fact that he hasn’t had much sexual experience, which is fine with me – everyone has a first time, or even just a first time in a while, and sometimes helping someone figure out what they like can make it more fun (all he said was that he didn’t have much experience, so I don’t know exactly what that meant). I think this is also where the problem came in, though.

Once we got to trying intercourse, it just… didn’t work. My first thought was that it could be our height difference (I’m 5’3″, he’s probably about a foot taller than me), but I’ve had sex with men of similar height before. It kind of seemed like he just didn’t really know what to do. We tried missionary first and I tried to direct him to aim down a bit more (more towards my back rather than straight forward), but whatever he was doing just wasn’t working. I tried getting on top and I think that would have worked fine, although at that point he was getting softer due to nerves and we eventually went back to just cuddling and touching and the like.

Overall, we both agreed that it was still a positive experience – at the end of the day we both had fun and felt good. I think he was a little embarrassed, but I assured him that he had no reason to be and I still enjoyed the experience.

I guess I’m just looking for some advice about how we could both improve next time. How can I help him understand what to do without sounding condescending, and does anyone any tips for how I can help him figure out what he likes? TIA!