My erection went away while trying to put on a condom, what do I do? /u/Silent_Internet0 Sex

2 weeks ago me and my gf were getting hot and heavy and we tried to have sex for the first time it would have been a quicky, we both are virgins but have already given each other oral sex, keep in mind I have never had problems with erections or erectile dysfunction, I’m very attracted to her both emotionally and sexually, but for some reason right when the condom touched the tip of my penis it went flacid, we tried so hard to make it go up again but gave up after a bunch of attempts.

I felt incredibly ashamed, and my gf left the room but when she came back she told me it was because she thought I wasn’t attracted to her or her body, but I didn’t believe her and assumed she was upset because of my failed erection, I still feel so ashamed to this day and we haven’t tried to have sex since, and the paranoia struck me and I just haven’t been able to feel calm or comfortable because I’m constantly thinking about what happened.

Today I had an erection and it was pretty stiff and I had it going for quite a while, I tried putting a condom on by myself to kinda train myself and again, as soon as I opened it, it went flacid, I’m so scared and upset that I maybe won’t be able to have a satisfying sex life.

I researched a bit and a lot of people say it is a normal thing but I just don’t buy it, and apart from that, I don’t care if its common, I want to fix it, I talked with my gf about it and she said she understood and was very loving and caring about my concerns, but something about it makes me not believe her, and I told her that if this became a reocurring thing I would break up with her since I want her to live a satisfying sex life and maybe, just maybe I won’t be able to give it to her.

I’m incredibly embarrased and upset, I don’t want to talk about it with her again since I feel ashamed and I constantly think about what happened, it’s one of those things I wish were just a nightmare.

I can’t book an appointment with a doctor or anything since I don’t make any money, still live with my parents and they are very religious and don’t really like the idea of sex, let alone condoms, healthcare is ultra expensive here and there’s really almost nothing I can do in that aspect. A lot of posts say that it’s just a matter of trying again, but I don’t want to ruin things again with her, it’s just so upsetting.

Note: The time I tried to put the condom by myself I was in a pretty positive mindset, not really nervous or anything, and I was pretty confident the whole time right up until the end when I realized nothing was working.

TL;DR: My erection went away while I was trying to put a condom on and ruined my first time with my gf, it still haunts me to this day, and today as I was trying to put a condom on by myself, alone, it happened again, how can I fix this?

2 weeks ago me and my gf were getting hot and heavy and we tried to have sex for the first time it would have been a quicky, we both are virgins but have already given each other oral sex, keep in mind I have never had problems with erections or erectile dysfunction, I’m very attracted to her both emotionally and sexually, but for some reason right when the condom touched the tip of my penis it went flacid, we tried so hard to make it go up again but gave up after a bunch of attempts.

I felt incredibly ashamed, and my gf left the room but when she came back she told me it was because she thought I wasn’t attracted to her or her body, but I didn’t believe her and assumed she was upset because of my failed erection, I still feel so ashamed to this day and we haven’t tried to have sex since, and the paranoia struck me and I just haven’t been able to feel calm or comfortable because I’m constantly thinking about what happened.

Today I had an erection and it was pretty stiff and I had it going for quite a while, I tried putting a condom on by myself to kinda train myself and again, as soon as I opened it, it went flacid, I’m so scared and upset that I maybe won’t be able to have a satisfying sex life.

I researched a bit and a lot of people say it is a normal thing but I just don’t buy it, and apart from that, I don’t care if its common, I want to fix it, I talked with my gf about it and she said she understood and was very loving and caring about my concerns, but something about it makes me not believe her, and I told her that if this became a reocurring thing I would break up with her since I want her to live a satisfying sex life and maybe, just maybe I won’t be able to give it to her.

I’m incredibly embarrased and upset, I don’t want to talk about it with her again since I feel ashamed and I constantly think about what happened, it’s one of those things I wish were just a nightmare.

I can’t book an appointment with a doctor or anything since I don’t make any money, still live with my parents and they are very religious and don’t really like the idea of sex, let alone condoms, healthcare is ultra expensive here and there’s really almost nothing I can do in that aspect. A lot of posts say that it’s just a matter of trying again, but I don’t want to ruin things again with her, it’s just so upsetting.

Note: The time I tried to put the condom by myself I was in a pretty positive mindset, not really nervous or anything, and I was pretty confident the whole time right up until the end when I realized nothing was working.

TL;DR: My erection went away while I was trying to put a condom on and ruined my first time with my gf, it still haunts me to this day, and today as I was trying to put a condom on by myself, alone, it happened again, how can I fix this?