How do I initiate sex? How do I stop feeling guilty for trying to initiate? /u/throwaway11212032 Sex

I (20s F) and my fiancé (20s M) both use reddit so I’m going to keep this as non detailed as possible so hopefully he won’t come across it. We’ve been together for over five years and engaged for a while now. We live together and are a generally happy couple. I’m not trying to brag, but our friends say we’re the couple they want their future/current relationship to look like. There’s one issue with that though…we haven’t had sex in over 8 months. Before this, we were both very HL. We were previously LDR, so every time we saw each other it was like an all day event lol. Obviously I don’t expect that now, as we are both full time students and I work a demanding career on top of that (Think 15+ hr work days when I do work… like 6am-9 or 10pm sometimes). When we moved in together 2 years ago, the lovemaking slowly slowed down to about once a week, which was fine with our schedule. About 9 months ago, I got diagnosed with PCOS. This wasn’t shocking to me as I’ve had the symptoms for a while (heavy cramping, bleeding after sex, heavy periods, etc.)But since then, my fiancé acts like he is scared to have sex with me due to the PCOS. I’ve tried to explain I’ll let him know when I’m in pain during sex and stuff like that, but I think he’s so afraid of hurting me it clouds his reasoning. This ends up hurting my feelings, because I’ve tried to initiate sex so much in the past few months, but he just brushes me off. There have been a few times I wake up at night and can hear him in the bathroom masturbating as well, so I know it’s not a libido problem. I just feel so lonely and touch starved. I love him so much, and I know he loves me too, it just really feels like he doesn’t want me some days. I feel like when I want to initiate now I’m bothering him, and it makes me feel guilty. How should I discuss this with him? I tried talking about it once and I gave him head and after he asked if we could stop for a while and it never resumed. I know my feelings are probably irrational but idk what to do :/

I (20s F) and my fiancé (20s M) both use reddit so I’m going to keep this as non detailed as possible so hopefully he won’t come across it. We’ve been together for over five years and engaged for a while now. We live together and are a generally happy couple. I’m not trying to brag, but our friends say we’re the couple they want their future/current relationship to look like. There’s one issue with that though…we haven’t had sex in over 8 months. Before this, we were both very HL. We were previously LDR, so every time we saw each other it was like an all day event lol. Obviously I don’t expect that now, as we are both full time students and I work a demanding career on top of that (Think 15+ hr work days when I do work… like 6am-9 or 10pm sometimes). When we moved in together 2 years ago, the lovemaking slowly slowed down to about once a week, which was fine with our schedule. About 9 months ago, I got diagnosed with PCOS. This wasn’t shocking to me as I’ve had the symptoms for a while (heavy cramping, bleeding after sex, heavy periods, etc.)But since then, my fiancé acts like he is scared to have sex with me due to the PCOS. I’ve tried to explain I’ll let him know when I’m in pain during sex and stuff like that, but I think he’s so afraid of hurting me it clouds his reasoning. This ends up hurting my feelings, because I’ve tried to initiate sex so much in the past few months, but he just brushes me off. There have been a few times I wake up at night and can hear him in the bathroom masturbating as well, so I know it’s not a libido problem. I just feel so lonely and touch starved. I love him so much, and I know he loves me too, it just really feels like he doesn’t want me some days. I feel like when I want to initiate now I’m bothering him, and it makes me feel guilty. How should I discuss this with him? I tried talking about it once and I gave him head and after he asked if we could stop for a while and it never resumed. I know my feelings are probably irrational but idk what to do :/